Life
Whether you openly admit it or not, many of us go into a new relationship with a set of expectations. But one thing you can't ever really expect to have is a partner who will willingly change for the relationship. If you happen to be dating a fixed sign, astrologer Cindy Mckean tells Bustle, change may not be in the cards. Expecting them to be more adaptable might be quite the challenge.
"When love is in the air, many of us are willing to go to great lengths to make our partners happy," Mckean says. "But sometimes we run into a partner that isn't willing to change for the relationship. To them, love is about not asking a person to change for the relationship." And there is something that can be learned from that — relationships should be about being with someone who truly accepts you for who you are, and vice versa.
Astrological signs can be broken up in different ways. One of the more familiar ways to classify a sign is through its element (i.e. Fire, Earth, Air, and Water). But you can also classify a sign through its modality, or ways in which a sign's characteristics are experienced, expressed, or approached.
For instance, cardinal signs like Aries and Cancer like to take initiative and mutable signs like Gemini and Virgo tend to be adaptable. Then there are those signs with a "fixed modality." As one can assume, these are fixed signs for a reason. These signs tend to be inflexible and more resistant to change.
If you are looking for a partner who can roll with the punches, or adapt to new environments you may want to check their zodiac sign, she says. So if you're dating any of the following zodiac signs, you may not be able to expect change.
1
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Being a fixed modality and an earth element, Taureans can pretty much the epitome of a stubborn bull. "A Taurus knows what they want in a partner and out of a relationship," Mckean says. "Stability and keeping the status quo is very important to a Taurus." But there is an exception for this. If a Taurus falls in love with you when they're younger, they are very capable of significant change. However, once they're set in their ways, they can be as "immovable as a mountain."
But don't let their stubborn nature scare you. There is a really good upside to this. Since Taurus is ruled by Venus, they're natural romantics. "The way they see being in a relationship is that you evolve together as a couple," Mckean says. Once they've fallen in love, they'll be ride or die loyal, keep seeing you as the most beautiful person they know, and they'll even remember your fond moments together well into old age. "With that in mind, not being able to change a Taurus isn't bad at all," she says.
2
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
Leo is another fixed modality sign who is wild about love. As Mckean says, they were born to be in love. "For a Leo, if there's no love in their life, it's like saying there's no sunshine in their life," she says. Since they're ruled by the Sun, their vibrant energy and positivity has more than likely left them with a good amount of attention and admirers. In a Leo's mind, if the crowd loves what they see, why change it? "Sure, you are still special to them if you're their partner, but the way they see it, love isn't about asking people to change," Mckean says. If you're understanding and accepting of how they are, you can also expect that your Leo will do the same for you. "As a fire element, they are forgiving, and with that forgiveness, they would never expect or demand that you be a different person for them in order for the relationship to work," she says. "They'll love you as you are."
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Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
Scorpios are a fixed water sign, which means that they're sensitive but also can be inflexible. "This mixed nuance is important in understanding why a Scorpio refuses to change for a relationship," Mckean says. At the very core of it, Scorpios are all about authenticity. "For a Scorpio, changing for a partner is akin to paying a false compliment," she says. "They stay true to their word and to themselves." If you're dating them, they expect the same of you. According to Mckean, many Scorpios prefer partners who have enough life experience to be true to their authentic selves. Same with all the other fixed signs, Scorpios won't make their partner change on behalf of their feelings or desires. "What they will demand is to know as much as they can about you and your equal devotion," she says. "For many, that's not only sexy, it's Scorpio."
4
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
Aquarians are known for being unique, liberal, open minded, and always living in the future. With those kind of characteristics, you can assume that they'd be open to change, right? According to Mckean, not when it comes to relationships. "Aquarius is all about fraternity, sorority, all people are created equal," she says. "That sentiment spills over into how they love and want to be loved." To them, wanting a partner to change or asking to change for a partner implies that something needs to be fixed. "To the Aquarius, that sentiment is truly bewildering and hurtful," she says. "That's not how real love works." So if you're dating an Aquarius know that love is never a power play for them. "Equality is a big deal," Mckean says. Purposefully trying to change yourself in order to gain someone's affection somehow breaks that equality. In fact, they would rather be single than be involved with someone looking to "improve them. "An Aquarius will never bring prejudice to a date, a relationship, or their love life," Mckean says. "They will respect and promote your individuality and uniqueness like no one else."
In general, you really can't expect to change someone regardless of their sign. Change is not something that can be forced, especially if it is a change you may want, but your partner doesn't. It has to come from the individual themselves. All you can really do is love and accept your partner for who they are. After all, wouldn't you want them to do the same for you?
