Pirates Review the Most Pirated Films of 2013 YARRR!
YARRR! A hoy hoy ye fair Bustle readers. Tis’ the end of 2013 an’ TorrentFreak has released the most pirated films of 2013. YARRRR! Tha’s right. Piratin’ is alive an’ well. Now these pirates might not hav’ been swashbucklin’ rebels who search the high seas for booty an’ adventure. Nay, these pirates be downloadin’ films from the deep and dark depths of college dorms. The Hobbit:An Unexpected Journey topped the list with more ‘an 8.4 million shares. YARRRRR!
Now thankfully none a’ these films were those crocks of croc poop tha’ were the Pirates of the Caribbean sequels. Nay. NAY! Though most a’ the most pirated films ah’ the year were quite violent. Lots of guns, not a lot of swords (that’s two severed pirate thumbs down!). So me and me shipmates took a look at the most pirated films of the year, and here’s what we pirates have ter say:
No. 1 'The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey'
A wee hairy bloke is tryin ter’ take me booty. I have tree rings on each finger buh’ ‘ee took me fav-rit. YARRRRRRRR.
No. 2 'Django Unchained'
Quentin Tarentino coul’ be quite the sea cap’n. This movie wa’ too violent. E’en fer a PIRATE. YARRRRRRRR!
No. 3 'Fast and Furious 6'
E’en we pirates know when to honor our mates, lost at sea. And so we raise our glasses above and below decks to ye, Mr. Walker.
No. 4 'Iron Man 3'
Ay, Robert Downey Jr., I’d like to see how tha’ fancy suit’d fare ye on the high seas. *Pirate cackle* YARRRRRRR!
No. 5 'Silver Linings Playbook'
I’M NOT CRYIN’. I was cuttin’ onion’s fer the slosh. QUIET YOU OR I’LL MAKE YE WALK THE PLANK. YARRRRRR.
No. 6 'Star Trek Into Darkness'
Ay, ay. I once cap’n’d a ship called the SS Cumberbatch. It was far too fancy for a pirate’s taste. YARRRRRRRR!
No. 7 'Gangster Squad'
OHHHH lots of guns have ye? Meet me mates on the poop deck at 700 hours an’ we’ll settle this once an’ fer all. Pirate Squad against Gangster Squad. Those guns are lookin’ pretty puny next to me cannons, eh? YARRRRRRR!
No. 8 'Now You See Me'
You better watch it with tha’ magic dere, fellas. They burn people at the stake fer’ tha’. YARRRRRRRRRRR!
No. 9 'The Hangover Part 3'
Drinkin’ too much an’ gettin kidnapped an’ nearly gettin’ killed ain’t called a Hangover. It’s called BEIN’ A PIRATE! YARRRRR! Also, they should have never made any sequels to this tired franchise. YARRRR!
No. 10 'World War Z'
Brad, yer hair is far too pretty to be a pirate! Buh’ if the zombie apocalypse comes ye’ can hide on me ship ANY DAY. YARRRRRRR!