We're So Jealous of Kate Middleton's Hospital Menu

Get out your drool bibs: Kate Middleton's hospital menu has been revealed. E! got the scoop on what the Duchess of Cambridge will be eating and drinking in the high-class Lindo wing of St. Mary's Hospital in London, and um, let's just put it this way: ice chips and a bruised banana do not a Duchess' birthing meal make.

According to reports, each meal Kate will be offered pre and post-birth will come with three courses. The breakfast selections include juice, fruit, cereal, and coffee or tea; the lunch and dinner menus feature cream of tomato soup, lamb chops, Mediterranean grilled chicken, and a bevy of side dishes; the snack menu has salads, omelets, potatoes, sandwiches, and baguettes; and for dessert, darling, you have your choice of cakes, fruits, and cheeses.

And if Kate's feeling like observing kosher or halal food traditions, that'll be available to her, as well, because, of course.

All this food-pampering probably makes mothers around the world seethe with jealousy -- their vending machine Snickers bars and their smuggled salami subs can't hold a candle to Kate's platter of fancy, fancy eats.

The most enviable part, though, is that the Lindo wing offers bubbly for the happy family to toast the arrival of the royal newborn.

A glass of champagne after a long day of pushing a human out of your vagina? Sounds apropos to us.