Birthday wishes aren't what they used to be. Once upon a time, your big day got you letters, telegrams, even human contact. Now, you get wall posts:
It takes longer to blow out a friggin' candle.
The Brazilian Outback Steakhouse felt that the world was getting cold and robotic, so they decided to lead the way to change. And now, we have this.
Yes, it's a chair, but not just any chair. It's called the B Day Chair, and it'll hug you—complete with music, flashing lights and shiny happy feelings—every time one of your friends posts a birthday wish to your Facebook timeline.
Even if it says, like, "I curse the day you were born." It'll still hug you.
Outback Steakhouse has developed the chair in a handy bit of self-promotion, hoping to get birthday folk to dine at the restaurant for those real-life lovin' feelings. (Would you really feel human love any more from a chair than you would from a Timeline post? Life's. Big. Questions.) Here's the video: it's in Portugese, but you get the idea from all the smiles and joy.
Predicted next bit of news: Diners Steal Outback B Day Chair So They Don't Even Have To Leave Home On Their Birthdays.