10 Signs You Should Not Marry Your Partner
Even if you've been in a relationship with your significant other for a number of years, that doesn't always mean they're the one for you. Qualities that are important to seek in those you date occasionally differ from qualities that are important to seek in those you consider marrying — and two people who may be compatible in a relationship might not work so well as a married couple. But, how does one know what the most important signs they should not marry their partner are? As go-to wedding site Loverly points out, they're often subtler than one might think — but they're extremely important to note as your relationship gets more and more serious. Here are the top signs that you should not marry your partner to look out for:
Deciding who will be your lifelong partner is a major decision, to say the least. Sometimes, people "just know" when they've met their other half... but, most of the time, it's more common to be less certain. Trust, being unsure is totally normal! If you fall into that category and are still trying to figure things out, here are 10 signs that your partner just might not be marriage material...
1. When You Imagine Your Future Together, You Imagine Him Or Her Changing In A Lot Of Ways
If you're telling yourself that everything will be different once you're married — he or she will finally start prioritizing you over their friends, support your career goals, be able to hold down a job, etc. — ask yourself whether you could be with your S.O. exactly as he or she is now for the rest of your life. A wedding isn't a magic wand that makes people grow up.
2. Your Significant Other Is Mean To You
You know that person who insults you and then says they are "joking" and that you're "too sensitive" when your face turns red and your eyes start filling with tears? Yeah, that person probably should not be your life partner. Run.
3. You're Afraid Of Being Alone
When everyone else around you is pairing off and having kids, it can be easy to build your sweetheart up into "The One" in your mind. But being married to someone who doesn't set your heart on fire is incredibly lonely — far lonelier than being uncoupled.
4. You Don't Feel Like Yourself When You're With Your Partner
Growing and changing is a natural part of life, but sometimes those changes feel forced and wrong. You shouldn't have to pretend to be someone you're not to keep your partner happy. Similarly, if you find that you don't like how you behave when you're with him (you feel insecure and needy, you're always irritable, etc.), it might be a bad sign.
5. Your Friends And Family Don't Life Your Significant Other
Sometimes, disapproval can be generational, or rooted in shallow judgments that you know to be unfair. But if your friends and family all disapprove of your partner, it's worth hearing them out and taking their objections seriously.
6. Your Significant Other Is Disrespectful
Whether they're rude to your friends, to your dog, to the waiter, or to entire populations, disrespect (or, worse—bigotry) is not a good quality in a life partner.
7. You Don't Feel Good Enough For Your Partner
Your other half should absolutely inspire you to be a better person. But, if you constantly feel like you'll never be smart enough, attractive enough, or rich enough, you'll grow resentful and unhappy... and will eventually want to be with someone who makes you feel like you're enough, just as you are.
8. You Don't Trust Each Other
If one of you is compelled to read the other's texts, check their Facebook, and give the third-degree after a night out, you need to get to the root of why there's so much snooping. Is it because you truly believe your partner is being shady? Is it insecurity showing through? Whatever the reason, it's not a good sign.
9. They Don't Want To Marry You
Marriage is a big step and it's completely fine if you aren't ready for it at the same time. But if you've been waiting and waiting (and waiting) for your partner to come around, but they still aren't comfortable talking about marriage, you might both need to be honest with yourselves.
10. You Know In Your Gut That They're Not The One For You
I can't tell you how many divorced people have said, "I remember thinking on my wedding day, 'Well, I can always get a divorce.'" If your gut is telling you this person isn't your person, you should really listen.
—By Rachel W. Miller
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