The Insane Ways Women Prep for Sex

We've all wanted to look extra good for that all-important "third date" with a new guy: nice outfit, careful makeup, some panties without holes, freshly-shaven legs. Attending to these items would take, what, an hour or so? But it's (allegedly) even more excessive than I suspected: the DailyMail reports that "women spend a whopping six hours preparing for their first night of passion with a new lover" according to a recent poll, and the details are ridiculous.

Beauty-wise, the study says, about one third of women get a facial and/or a spray tan before a steamy date, and three quarters get their hair professionally styled. Women are doing some pre-date shopping, too: two thirds of those polled buy new lingerie, and one in five buy new bedsheets. On the date itself, three quarters of the women skip the carbs (although to my mind, that's just a quick way to suck all the fun out of a potentially free and upscale meal). And one fifth of women attempt to police their date's drinking, presumably in an attempt to avoid performance issues, which would be all the more disappointing after that extreme primping session.

I don't know about you, but I'm not sure I could spend six hours preparing for a special date, even if I wanted to. Facials are expensive, spray tans look weird, and waxing hurts. As for lingerie...let's just say that the correlation between niceness of lingerie and how excited a man is to get busy is, in my experience, totally non-existent. And if it really has become a rule of etiquette to toss and re-buy underwear in between sex partners, as the poll says, then I certainly missed the memo.

The poll was conducted by a lingerie company, so maybe the customers sampled are all just super fussy. In any case, I'm here to encourage you to do as little or as much first-time preparation as you damn well please. In all likelihood, he isn't going to notice, so it's mostly for yourself anyways. And if the sex goes well, be prepared to kiss that fresh blow-out a rapid good-bye.

Image: © MaxFrost - Fotolia.com