Being a Single Mom Isn't a "Celeb Trend"

Are female celebs ditching the walk down the aisle for a walk with a stroller instead? The ladies of CBS round table show The Talk brought that question to the forefront, pointing out that several women like Jessica Simpson, Eva Mendes, and Scarlett Johansson seemed to be following a "trend" as celebrities who were having babies before marriage. It’s definitely not a new concept or even a trend like this year’s crop top — though reality star Kim Kardashian might follow both. But viewing it as a "celebrity trend" makes it seem as ephemeral as last year’s high-low maxi dresses or an all quinoa diet. It’s a lifestyle choice, certainly, but I see it as more of a broader acceptance of different versions of family.

Actress Zoe Saldana, who recently announced her first pregnancy with husband Marco Perego, added her two cents as a guest on the show saying,

I think it’s important to remember that God gave us a will or the universe gave us the right to choose what is right for us. Because I think that I’ve been a witness and I was also a product of a very painful marriage of people that loved each other but just couldn’t make things work between them. Once they decided to separate they were the most amazing parents and the most amazing and happy people apart. Sometimes people get married for all the wrong reasons. I say wait if you want to believe in marriage and do it right. Be happy and try to make it work and if it’s not, have kids. It’s great.

Seeing it as a celebrity trend dilutes a life altering decision, making it seem like people are just doing it because it's cool, when it's really a huge commitment a person makes. Talking about single celebrity parents — young, fabulous ones to boot! — in this way makes it seem like motherhood is a really easy choice these women are just making on a whim. Cohost Sharon Osbourne was quick to point out that they were discussing independent women who were successful and able to provide for themselves. Though, she did joke-but-not-really-because-she-is-a-serious-scary-momma that if her girls came home pregnant without a husband, then that would be it.

As far as choosing to be a single mother rather than being a wife first? People need to, and are beginning to, accept the fact that both statuses are different and not necessarily joined at the hip. Cohost Aisha Tyler summed it up perfectly:

Traditionalists feel like you get married and then you have kids and I get it, but I look at it and marriages dissolve. Parenthood never ends. So, that’s really the biggest commitment of all. You’re committed to that child for the rest of your life. The love for a child is something that can endure anything.