You Need a Black Friday Pep Talk: Let Me Be Your Coach
Some people run marathons, others rehearse for recitals, but not you. No, your big moment has nothing to do with nonsense physical preparation. It all lies in your top notch mental stamina and in order to prevail, you have to train right. Because it's Black Friday and it's show time, baby. I mean, look at it this way, first timers. It's midnight, you're two weeks over due with your enormously overweight food fetus, it's cold as shite and the wind is whipping at your delicate, adorably rosy cheeks. But you've already committed and plus, your cousin drove so, you literally can't back out even if you wanted to. Which, yeah, in hindsight maybe you should've been a little less lazy and drove your damn self. But, now you're in this thing, and you're a champ. You just don't know it yet.
So, if you're facing that regret or are on the fence about getting 90 percent off of a 60 inch television set you really didn't even need in the first place, perhaps these classic movie pep talks will help pump you up and carry you through your shopping trip. Or, you know, at least provide some sort of entertainment as you wait on a line wrapped three times outside of Best Buy.
LAMENTING YOUR DECISION ON THE CAR RIDE OVER
Black Friday comes but once a year. This is your chance to get everything at the price it's supposed to be.
WHEN YOU EYE THE MOB OF HUNGRY EYED PEOPLE CLAWING AT THE MALL ENTRANCE
Maybe not physically, but at least you knew enough to park in the parking lot across the street, so... mentally you're way ahead.
FOR WHEN YOU FIND YOURSELF ROCKING BACK AND FORTH IN THE FETAL POSITION IN A DARK CORNER OF MACY'S
Look how far you've come! YOU CAN DO THIS.
WHEN YOU'VE LOST YOUR POSSE IN THE MIDDLE OF A CAVERNOUS FOREVER 21
You'll find them again... one day.
WHEN YOU LOSE SIGHT OF WHY YOU'RE THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE
Because if we don't negate a holiday devoted to being thankful of what we already have, who even are we?
WHEN SOMEONE GRABS THE LAST FROZEN DOLL YOU PROMISED YOUR NIECE WITH A BLOOD OATH
It's the thought and the ridiculous time of morning you woke up to try and get it that counts.
WHEN YOU ACCIDENTALLY RUN YOUR CART INTO ANOTHER SHOPPER AND THEY DEMEAN YOU, BODY AND SOUL
And they just wasted that minute and a half yelling at you as all of the iPads sold out. Chin up.
Images: NBC; Giphy (10)