Entertainment

'Queer Eye For The Straight Guy' Is Reuniting: Here Are Other Artifacts We Need From 2003

Okay, Magical Time Machine: A Queer Eye For The Straight Guy reunion is a seriously solid start. God knows we've missed Bravo's Leading Men Jai, Carson, Ted, Thom and Kyan. Plus, I'm so sure men all over the world have missed their sharp style and on-point decorating/cooking/not being a cave-man advice, right? The thing is, if we're going down that road, past all the other oldies-but-goodies from the Queer Eye era, it's just not enough to get together our favorite gay life-stylists for a sit down. We want more — nay, we need more, so here's a handy list of all the other bits of 2003 we'd like to see some more of this year.

'Queer Eye For The Straight Guy' Is Reuniting, But What Else Do We Need To Bring Back From 2003?

Okay, Magical Time Machine: A Queer Eye For The Straight Guy reunion is a seriously solid start. God knows we've missed Bravo's Leading Men Jai, Carson, Ted, Thom and Kyan. Plus, I'm so sure men all over the world have missed their sharp style and on-point decorating/cooking/not being a cave-man advice, right? The thing is, if we're going down that road, past all the other oldies-but-goodies from the Queer Eye era, it's just not enough to get together our favorite gay life-stylists for a sit down. We want more — nay, we need more, so here's a handy list of all the other bits of 2003 we'd like to see some more of this year.

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Fonzworth Bentley

Remember this guy? He was the suave dude dancing around with an umbrella in OutKast's video for "Roses." Damn, the man knows how to rock a plaid and, also, his dance moves. His sweet, sweet dance moves. And his name. And his umbrella. Pretty much everything about Fonzworth Bentley needs to make a comeback.

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Missy Elliott

Okay, okay: Missy Elliott is clearly timeless, I know. Buuuut, remember those golden days when we'd get to see her sweatsuit-ed magnificence at the Grammys and on MTV, and listen to her weirdly vagina-centric rap skillz on the radio all the time? Those were the good old days. Even writing this just makes me want to put on some big hoops and rap every single lyric to "Pass That Dutch." Because I can actually do that.

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'That's So Raven'

Thaaaat's so Ravennnnn, it's the future I can seeeee, that's so Raven, SO MYSTERIOUS TO MEEEE yeeeaaaahhh, YUP that's me! Now try and tell me you don't have fond memories of our favorite teenage oracle. That's So Raven was Disney Channel at its weird and slightly antiquated best. Plus, if we hadn't had That's So Raven, we never would have been witness to Raven Symone's strange coming-out-of-the-closet saga, and without that, I'd lead an empty and directionless life. So bring back Raven, ya nasty.

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Bell Bottoms Being Cool

For all you skinny-jean loving, perfect-toned-leg-having ladies, just take a seat for a moment and hear me out. People with perfect thighs look good in all jeans, so skinny, wide, or otherwise, it's all fabulous. But for the rest of us — we huddled masses yearning to breathe free — the bell-bottom craze was a momentary utopia. The bell at the bottom made everyone's legs look curvaceous instead of lumpy, and sometimes, you could get away with wearing ugly-but-comfortable shoes. Those days are gone folks, but maybe someday, we'll get them back.

The Term "Freedom Fries"

Oh Millenials, remember that time the government tried to make us rename fries in order to give France the royal finger over Iraq War drama? It was kind of the only thing that made us smile during the Iraq War. So I guess that's good. But also... freedom fries. Hahahahahahahahahha.

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