The "Most Perfect Celebrity" Looks Like a Frankenzombie From Tina Fey's Nightmare
Honestly, the whole idea of this poll kind of reminds me of that Season 2 episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer where this kid is somehow able to resurrect his dead brother, then decides that since his brother looks all decomposed and gross, he needs to build him a hot zombie bride and starts to eye all the girls he goes to high school with to try and figure out what body parts he wants to use from who. Cordelia eventually gets chosen to be the head, but of course, Buffy and co. save the day and Cordy gets to keep her head firmly placed on her own body. Anyway, this poll from Hollyscoop is kind of like that in the sense that the site asked people to choose their favorite body part from a bunch of different celebs to create the so-called "most perfect celebrity," then they actually went ahead and posted a mock up image of how this woman would look if she was real.
And she looks TERRIFYING.
And also a little like Sofia Vergara if Sofia Vergara was a manufactured zombie, to be honest, but that's just because she is literally made up of mostly Sofia Vergara. Really, look at the breakdown of the choices:
Legs: Jennifer Aniston
Boobs: Jennifer Love Hewitt
Abs: Gwen Stefani
Curves: Sofia Vergara
Arms: Jennifer Aniston
Hair: Sofia Vergara
Eyes: Zooey Deschanel
Smile: Kate Middleton
Eyebrows: Megan Fox
Jawline: Victoria Beckham
Nose: Scarlett Johansson
And this is the mock up of the "most perfect celebrity," as described by the certainly confused masses.
This is what the demons from nightmares ARE AFRAID OF. Also, it's a little reminiscent of what Tina Fey said in her book, Bossypants, about what women are expected to look like by today's ridiculous beauty standards:
Now every girl is expected to have Caucasian blue eyes, full Spanish lips, a classic button nose, hairless Asian skin with a California tan, a Jamaican dance hall ass, long Swedish legs, small Japanese feet, the abs of a lesbian gym owner, the hips of a nine-year-old boy, the arms of Michelle Obama, and doll tits. The person closest to actually achieving this look is Kim Kardashian, who, as we know, was made by Russian scientists to sabotage our athletes.
Add to that passage the "hair of Sofia Vergara," and this poll is literally that excerpt come to life. So, everyone note it now: The perfect woman looks like a frankenzombie.