This Teen Can Deadlift More Than Twice Her Weight

A person's teenage years are often characterized by indulging in junk food binges that make no lasting mark on their highly-metabolizing bodies (I hate all of you kids; If I even look at a piece of pizza, my body starts rebelling.), smoking cigarettes, aimlessly driving around looking for convenience stores to rob and old ladies to bother, and brainstorming excuses to justifiably skip classes. At least, that's whta I assume teenagers do. I'm in my late-20s; I don't really remember those ancient days. But then there are total badass teenagers like 14-year-old Rachel McInnis who completely throw off my beloved stereotypes about the uselessness, laziness, and general grossness of adolescents by opting to spend her leisure time totally killing it at her chosen hobby: the sinewy cult that is CrossFit.

This video started with what was supposed to be a surprise for McInnis: Her favorite CrossFit superstar, Lauren Fisher, arrived without warning to McInnis's regular gym as a special treat. The real treat turned out to be McInnis's overwhelming talent and drive. McInnis, at just 110 pounds, can deadlift 240 lbs. No, but really, WHUT? I'm also totally smitten with her Minnie Mouse eyelashes which she unintentionally bats while shyly discussing her warm-up routine, capabilities, and general accomplishments. Fisher doesn't say it, but you can tell she is downright floored at this whippersnapper's stuff (not that Fisher is ancient or anything, being only 21 years old herself). McInnis's excitement about working out with her idol is apparent and would be so super adorable if I wasn't so distracted by trying to make my lower jaw meet my upper one again. These are two ladies I'd most definitely want on my apocalypse survival team (which, yes, I am always thinking about). Maybe I should do some crunches today or something. Anyway, see the duo crush it below. If you need me, I'll just be over here hurtling mercilessly toward my grave from the comfort of my couch.