Entertainment

They're Never Going to Break Up. Ever.

by Lindsay Mannering

Just hours before the big proposal, Kanye West gave an interview to San Francisco radio station KMEL during which he talked about everything from his admiration for Drake to his respect for Jay-Z to his love for Kim Kardashian. It was all very positive — perhaps the pending proposal made him a big giddy — but there was a dark side. He didn't reveal that later that night he was planning on popping the question, but he did gush about how much he loves his girl. And things got a little creepy. Well, creepy or sweet. Really depends on how you want to read into this whole thing: Kanye wants to live forever in heaven with Kim.

When deejays Sana and Kimmie asked about his relationship, Kanye replied:

I have never loved any girl, other than my mother, as much as I love my girlfriend. I'm so happy to be with her, to live this life together, and — with our relationship with God — to be able to live forever in heaven together, and also to raise a strong family that communicates truth and beauty.

First off, if ever there was a doubt that this relationship was all for press and publicity, this quote right here might erase the speculation. Kanye really, like, really loves Kim. I just don't think he's that good of an actor, which is why I believe this is all truthiness coming from his heart.

But doesn't it sound a bit, how you say, obsessive? It sort of reminds me of Bop It. Do you remember that '90s toy that everyone couldn't get enough of? Twist it! Pull it! Bop it! We played it non-stop for about a month, then never picked it up again. Granted, I don't think any of us had children with the toy, so Kimye's connection is certainly stronger than ours with the battery-powered game, but still: When you come in fast and hard, you usually burn out.

Don't worry, though. If Kim and Kanye break up, it sounds like he's saying it won't happen in this lifetime. Any break up they go through will either be while residing post-mortem in the palace in the sky — she wants a stratus next to Freddie Prinze Jr. and SMG; he wants a quiet cumulus far from everyone else, arguments ensue — or when they're inevitably reincarnated as knock-off leather jogging pants.

But in this life? Kim and Kanye will last forever. And when they die, together, Notebook-style, the coroner will find a handwritten note in Yeezus's pocket that reads: "A glooming peace this morning with it brings; The sun, for sorrow, will not show his head: Go hence, to have more talk of these sad things, because my girl and me are the MOST influential people in the WORLD."