Entertainment

The Stars of 'Twisted' Take A Cringeworthy Curtain Call

by Molly Fitzpatrick

Mole person Jo Masterson has decided to expand her minimal social circle. This is good. Your GPA ain't everything — get it, girl. But this week's award for physical comedy goes to Jo's far worse-adjusted friend Rico, who fake-sharpens an air pencil to avoid a chatty new lab partner.

Jo persuades murder suspect Danny Desai to join her in volunteering for the school's Sobriety Awareness Day (I love how that title's open to interpretation) to get closer to their former friend Lacey Porter. Lacey and the rest of the popular crew have been roped into appearing in an anti-drunk-driving skit that's straight out of Freaks and Geeks.

"Teenage sobriety has always been a pet cause of mine," Danny deadpans.

With the approval of lovably neurotic director Phoebe, Desai writes his own D.A.R.E.-worthy script. Starring the three childhood buddies themselves, the melodrama proves to be a thinly veiled version of the all-too-real tension among them. The play's the thing:

"I just want to forget," Lacey says. "You're never going to be able to forget," Jo answers, "But you might as well forgive." Womp womp.

But their praiseworthy performance is undercut by mean girl Sarita and her "PSA" about binge-drinking: a video of Jo, drunk at Regina's house, remixed to a dance beat. Double womp womp.

Though Kyle Masterson's style of policework primarily involves having unpleasant conversations with acquaintances, it's paying off. His search for the murdered Regina's missing red necklace does hit a bump in the road — he'd spotted identical jewelry worn by dead Aunt Tara in a Desai family photo, but Danny destroyed the picture. Nevertheless, the investigation is back on track when Chief Kyle discovers another shot of Tara and the telltale necklace in a box of old photos in his own garage.

For those of you playing along at home, it's Lacey's meathead boyfriend Archie — with conflicting stories about staying home during Regina's party yet borrowing a friend's car that night — who's juuuust starting to seem a teensy weensy bit suspicious. I knew I didn't trust that jawline.

Best possible thing to say about a clingy one-night stand: "It's like she's given my soul an STD."

Best possible thing to say when things aren't good, fine or okay: "It's very good. And fine. And okay. Okay?"

Image via ABC Family