'Star Wars' Launches Instagram With a Darth Vader Selfie, So Naturally We're Worried

Go ahead and put your head in your hands right now, Star Wars fans, because it's about to get unbearable around these parts. An official Star Wars Instagram has cropped up as word of J.J. Abrams' Star Wars sequels continues to spill out — we recently learned of R2D2's return as well as the film's 2015 release date. Fans have already begun to worry greatly about the quality of Disney's sequels, which are slated to include individual character films as well, and things like this certainly aren't helping.

The promotional account's first image is that of Darth Vader taking a selfie. Yes, actually. The fact that the words "Darth Vader" and "selfie" can be found anywhere in the same sentence is mind-blowing and at least mildly upsetting. Is nothing sacred? They're eyeing a Yoda movie despite the fact that he died in Return of the Jedi, so of course not.

Still, we know that Abrams and his team of creatives probably weren't even aware that the account was created or that it would include ridiculous, poorly Photoshopped images of Darth Vader imitating a Millennial. And we know this because there are several major issues with this image being used as promotional material for the new Star Wars movies.

But first, the photo:

And now, the issues:

  1. Whoever created this doesn't understand selfies. Vader is taking a picture of himself with his phone the way someone's uncle who hasn't discovered every cell phone's built-in selfie mode might do so.
  2. Also, someone else would have had to take this picture because of the way Vader is failing at selfies. I'm going to have a bruise on my forehead by the time we're done here.
  3. There are dead bodies in the background of his selfie. You know, Instagram doesn't have a "this guy's taking pictures with dead bodies" button, but "flag as inappropriate" is a thing.
  4. Vader is wearing gloves while operating an iPhone and as anyone who's ever experienced winter with an iPhone knows, gloves don't work on smart phone touch screens.
  5. Why is Darth Vader the one leading the promo charge for the new sequels? Spoiler: dude dies in Return of the Jedi and his spirit form looks like Hayden Christensen. Vader does not get invited to the sequel party (if Abrams is doing it right), y'all.
  6. There is nothing about this that is not completely and totally weird. Make it stop.

Image: StarWars/Instagram