Emma McGowan is a sex positive feminist whose hobbies include embroidery, sewing ridiculous clothing, oversharing on the internet, connecting with other women and femmes, and reading at least three books a week. Her work has appeared in Mashable, Mic, The Bold Italic, The Daily Dot's The Kernel, and her own site, Kink&Code.

Latest Articles

The One Thing You Need To Do Before You Meet Your Partner's Parents

Last summer, one of my brothers brought a girl home after only a few months of dating. We, his six siblings, were like, “Dude, really?” They hadn’t committed to each other yet and there they were, sev...
By Emma McGowan

Here's When A Grown-Ass Woman Defines The Relationship

Dating in 2017 is hella ambiguous. Our generation has done a great job of throwing most hard and fast dating rules out the window. These days, it’s pretty much up to you whether you want to wait one m...
By Emma McGowan

Your Pheromones Are Sending Out Signals You’re Don't Even Know About

Cats cry when they’re in heat. Baboons’ butts turn bright red when they’re fertile. Cows spend more time standing up and mooing when they’re ready for insemination. But human females don’t have an imm...
By Emma McGowan

7 Interactions We've All Had With Exes On Social Media

Social media has brought a lot into our lives. Information about our best friend from third grade. New ways to take photos of ourselves. A fascination with how food looks, in addition to how it tastes...
By Emma McGowan

The Eclipse Probably Didn't Affect Your Period, So You Can Go Back To Worrying About Your Eyes

There’s been a lot of talk about the idea that the August 21 solar eclipse — which, as a reminder, happens when a new moon passes in front of the sun — could be messing with women’s periods this month...
By Emma McGowan

How To Write A Cover Letter That Will Actually Get You Hired, According To HR Experts

For the third year in a row, Bustle's Upstart Awards are honoring young women who are doing incredible things in the realms of business, STEM, fashion and beauty, the arts, philanthropy, and beyond. W...
By Emma McGowan

What To Do After You've Been Fired, As Told By HR Experts

For the third year in a row, Bustle's Upstart Awards are honoring young women who are doing incredible things in the realms of business, STEM, fashion and beauty, the arts, philanthropy, and beyond. W...
By Emma McGowan

Most Americans Think This Plant Describes How They Are In Relationships

I love plants. I grew up in a house that felt like a jungle and with a mom who made sure every square inch of our yard was covered with garden. Seriously — even the half a foot between the driveway an...
By Emma McGowan

13 Tweets In Response To Trump's Transgender Military Ban That Will Inspire You

In the early morning hours of July 26, President Trump announced — on Twitter — that transgender people will no longer be allowed to serve openly in the military “in any capacity.” The president wrote...
By Emma McGowan

There's A Shocking Number Of Fake Abortion Clinics & Here's What You Can Do

Have you ever felt the call to go counter-protest at an abortion clinic? You know — protest the protestors? I have. I think that what abortion clinic protestors do is wrong and part of me absolutely i...
By Emma McGowan

What You Need To Know About Vacation Flings

Vacation. It’s a time for kicking back, relaxing, maybe getting some sun — and having a vacation fling. Vacation flings have the potential to go so many ways, from excellent to “meh” to terrifying. Th...
By Emma McGowan

How To Actually Meet Someone When You're On Vacation

Summertime — and the lovin’ is easy. (Wait, is that not how that lyric goes?) It’s always how it went for me, back when I was single. Starting in sixth grade I would dump my school year boyfriend beca...
By Emma McGowan

What The Abortion Rights Movement Can Learn From The Marriage Equality Win

There are two major issues that have to do with sexuality in our culture: Abortion rights and marriage equality. And while the country finally got marriage equality two years ago, abortion rights have...
By Emma McGowan

This Woman Is Giving Unsolicited NSFW Pics The Audience They Deserve

Picture this: You walk into a funky apartment. It’s got a real ‘70s vibe — a breakfast nook with vintage patio furniture, an avocado-colored fridge, a bed covered in denim with hand-embroidered throw ...
By Emma McGowan

Why Pride Is So Political This Year

For years and years, the quest for marriage equality was the main focus of mainstream LGBTQ organizations. An unbelievable amount of time and money went into the fight and, on June 26, 2015, activists...
By Emma McGowan

19 LGBTQIA+ Millennials On How Straight People Can Be Better Allies

Ally. It's a word that gets thrown around a lot, especially in the age of Trump. People are feeling really motivated to step outside of their own privilege and get involved in movements that are lifti...
By Emma McGowan

7 LGBTQ Millennials On What Pride Means To Them This Year

June is Pride month because in 1969 a group of queer people — led by trans women of color and lesbians — fought back after suffering years of abuse from the police. On June 28 of that year, police rai...
By Emma McGowan

11 Crucial Moments In The History Of The Reproductive Rights Movement

I’m one of those women who basically always thinks she’s pregnant. Seriously — at least once every month, some part of my brain convinces me that I must be pregnant, despite the fact that I’m really c...
By Emma McGowan

What Your Relationship Status Says About Your Sleep Habits

Oh, sleep — the unspoken battleground of the cohabitating couple. He steals the blankets. She talks in her sleep. He snores. She kicks him in the nuts a couple times per year. He occasionally has nigh...
By Emma McGowan

13 Funny Pride Sign Ideas

For me, the best part of Pride parades has always been the costumes. From drag queens with massive wigs and even taller shoes to pretty boys in assless chaps to drag kings in fake mustaches, you’ll fi...
By Emma McGowan

The Way To Supercharge Your Sex Life In 2017

The New Year is a great time to make changes — that’s what New Year’s resolutions are all about, right? But while all of your friends are resolving to finally start working out regularly or change the...
By Emma McGowan

Why Hard Times In Your Relationship Are Important

Our culture loves to romanticize the “perfect” romantic relationship. You know what I’m talking about: the married couple that got together in high school and are still going strong 20 years later; th...
By Emma McGowan

Can You Be Friends With An Ex If You Have An S.O.?

I’m one of those people who tries to stay friends with my exes — to varying degrees of success. My philosophy is that I’ve invested so much time, energy, and love into these people and it would be a w...
By Emma McGowan

11 Topics To Talk About That Aren't Your Love Life

Are you sick of people asking you all the time about your relationship status?  Or maybe you have that one friend who can’t seem to talk about anything else? I feel you. As a woman, I feel sometimes l...
By Emma McGowan

How To Create New Holiday Traditions With Your SO

My boyfriend and I were talking to a friend about our plans for Christmas the other day. I offhandedly said, “Oh, we’re just going to do what we always do,” and it wasn’t until later that I realized h...
By Emma McGowan

9 Christmas Foods That Are Also Aphrodisiacs

My associations with Christmas dinner don’t have anything to do with sex. I think of family, too much champagne, and stuffing my face until all I want to do is recline on the couch with my little brot...
By Emma McGowan

Why You Might Not Be Into Casual Sex

Being able to have casual sex might just be one of the greatest things about being alive in the United States in this day and age. I mean, sex out of wedlock was generally frowned upon before the sexu...
By Emma McGowan

Why You Should Consider Getting This For Your Mom

My mom offered to buy me a vibrator when I was 13. At the time, I was totally grossed out — like, EW MOM! — but in retrospect, that was an awesome, sex positive, badass thing for her to do. She realiz...
By Emma McGowan

11 Sex Toys To Give Your Relationship

The holidays aren’t a particularly sexy time of year. From a lot of enforced family time to bulky layer upon bulky layer before we get to the nudity to all the stress, it wouldn’t be weird if sex fell...
By Emma McGowan

7 Reasons Why Winter Is The Best Season For Sex

Right when the leaves turned from bright green to brilliant oranges and reds and suddenly everyone began wearing flannel, I started dreaming of having winter sex. This past summer was one of the hotte...
By Emma McGowan

7 Self-Care Tips When Your Partner Is Depressed

Dealing with a partner’s depression is really, really hard. On the one hand, you know that what they’re going through is not their fault. On the other hand, it’s difficult not to feel hurt when they p...
By Emma McGowan

Love Languages Might Save Your Relationship

My boyfriend and I recently resolved a conflict that we’ve had since we first started dating. On the face of things, it’s pretty simple: I want him to tell me he loves me and give me more compliments ...
By Emma McGowan

Where To Have Sex This Week

There is absolutely nothing wrong with having sex in a bed. In fact, I’d even say it’s my favorite spot, mainly because I’m generally lazy and not terribly flexible. But sometimes nothing is better th...
By Emma McGowan

13 Sexy Stocking Stuffers For $20 And Under

I don’t know about you, but my family is really into stocking stuffers. My grandma is so into them that she wraps each individual one, which is kind of awesome because you get to open way more present...
By Emma McGowan

Black Friday Sex Toy Deals You Don't Want To Miss

Personally, nothing sounds worse to me than shopping on Black Friday: I hate large crowds, I hate lines, and I’m usually hungover on the day after Thanksgiving. However, I do love saving money, which ...
By Emma McGowan

13 Grassroots Organizations To Donate To Right Now

The day after the election, I donated to Planned Parenthood. It wasn’t the first time I’d done that — they were my primary healthcare provider in the years that I had no money and as soon as I could, ...
By Emma McGowan

9 Sex Toys To Give Your BFF For The Holidays

My best friend broke up with her partner of five years last Fall. While she was going through a particularly rough time this summer, I was dealing with some stuff in my own relationship and her suppor...
By Emma McGowan

This Is A Next Level Safety Pin

I have an awesome new addition to the #SafetyPin movement that I think you’re going to love as much as I do: The Ally Pin from Unbound. But before I get into why I love it, here’s a quick recap of the...
By Emma McGowan

#MomentOfTruth Is For Anyone Who Is Scared Now

Emily May started thinking about what she and her organization, Hollaback! — which documents and combats street harassment around the world — were going to about the hate that now President-elect Dona...
By Emma McGowan

7 Tips For Boosting Your Confidence In Bed

Do you think you’re great in bed? If your answer is something along the lines of “Well… Maybe?” you’re not alone. According to the SKYN Condoms Millennial Sex Survey, only 45 percent of Millennials sa...
By Emma McGowan