Is A First Date During Mercury Retrograde 2017 A Bad Idea? The Stars Are Not On Our Side This Holiday Season

Ad failed to load

Trying to start a relationship in the middle of the holidays is the actual worst. Mercury adds fuel to the fire this season entering retrograde on December 3 and staying there until December 22. So is a first date during Mercury retrograde over the 2017 holiday season a bad idea? Much like doing anything for the first time during Mercury retrograde: probably.

"It is OK to accept a first date but do not expect or wish for longevity in the relationship," warns astrologer Linda Furiate. "It may be best to think of this date more as a social event or a fun night out."

The holidays present a specific set of challenges to first dates all on their own, without Mercury meddling in the matter. No one is checking their dating app messages amidst the overwhelm of holiday chaos. Between holiday planning and traveling, no one has the time in their schedules to carve out for a first date. And increased family time can leave a lot of people too stressed out for the bonus emotional labor of charming a stranger.

Ad failed to load

Plus, it's cold outside, so everyone wants to be snuggled in their own beds watching Netflix and not pulling on a fourth layer of heat-tech while still trying to approximate sexy. And bad weather severely limits free/cheap date options that are still cute and comfortable, which can be enough to discourage some folks, too. I'm so accustomed to OkCupid radio silence in the final few weeks of the the year that if I'm not cuffed by mid-November, I usually just resign myself to packing it in until January.

Mercury retrograde is notorious for messing with communication, so the stars are not exactly on our side this holiday season either. Some common warnings around this particular astrological event are things like don't sign contracts, beware of glitchy technology, and assume it's going to take you longer to get everywhere thanks to failing transportation. So what havoc is Mercury Retrograde going to wreak on your first date? Part of the problem is that this is a bad time for new things in general.

Ad failed to load

"Mercury retrograde is a time to revisit things from the past (retro) and improve them (grade), not start anything new, especially when it’s love related," Jaye, an astrologer at GiftedAstrology.com tells Bustle. "Energies are unstable when they are in retrograde and should your relationship go beyond the first date, it will have the markings of retrograde on it forever more, making communication in the relationship a little more work than most."

But if all these signs pointing to don't you dare aren't enough to dissuade you, then 1) are you an Aries from my past? and 2) here's what you can do to prepare for your probably doomed date: give yourself extra time to travel, double check the time, and triple check the details. Do not let some poor soul think you stood them up just because you insisted on a date during this miserable hellscape of a planetary alignment!

Also, Jaye suggests keeping backup phone chargers handy, bringing a backup payment method to the date in case your first one gets declined, and keeping receipts for any new purchases you made related to the date. (Hi, what on earth would possess you to think that this is a good time to experiment with a new look? It is not.) In case you can't tell, I am an earth sign and thus a Mercury retrograde doomsday prepper, but this period does actually have some emotional benefits.

Ad failed to load

"Remind yourself that retrograde is only three weeks long and its purpose is to show us where our lives can be improved, including our love lives," Jaye says. "When we are mindful and live consciously through tribulations (even if it’s just a little snafu on a first date), try to think of it as a pivot point where the universe is setting us up for greater success — that way, when the planetary energies move forward we will know a little more about ourselves and what we need in love."

Furiate agrees. "It is best to keep an open mind and loving heart during a Mercury retrograde," she says. "Mercury being the planet that rules all forms of communication is simply asking us to be mindful of our thoughts."

Ad failed to load

Geminis and Virgos are the communicators of the zodiac, largely because they're ruled by Mercury, so folks with a lot of Gemini and Virgo in their star charts may feel the effects of this period a little more intensely. Be mindful of added stress, increased anxiety, and feeling more scattered than usual, which could lead to impulsive decision-making. Ultimately, according to Furiate, "Mercury retrograde itself is rather harmless if we choose to delay solidifying or committing to our plans and ideas during the retrograde."

"Just be mindful that once Mercury begins his forward journey our frame of mind may often shift back to our reality," she says. "So that person who appeared to be perfect on your first date during the Mercury retrograde may actually turn out to be a bad idea or lesson learned."

Ad failed to load
Must Reads

These Are The Beauty Products That Came Out In May That You DEFINITELY Need On Your Radar

For beauty lovers, months aren't just months: They're 28 to 31 day periods, wherein any and all product and brand launches can happen — and when they do, it feels like your birthday, no matter what time of the year you were actually born. The May 201…
By Amanda Richards

Everything Leaving & Coming To Netflix In June To Help Get Your Summer Started

Summer is right around the corner, and so is another batch of streaming options to get excited about. On Wednesday, everything leaving and coming to Netflix in June 2018 was announced by the streaming platform. And don't worry, there's something for …
By Jamie Primeau

The 5 Rom-Coms You Need To Read This Summer, According To Someone Who Writes Them

'Tis the season for rom-coms. The weather is warm, the sun is shining, and everyone is rocking the flirtiest items in their wardrobe. I don't know about you, but summer always takes me back to my teenage years — and that automatically makes me want t…
By Cristina Arreola

11 Tiny Sunglasses That Will Make You Look Even Cooler Than Kylie Jenner

You know what they say — the tinier the sunglasses, the more stylish the outfit. OK, that's not really a saying, but it seems to be the case these days. Basically every celebrity, model, and It person has been spotted sporting tiny sunglasses as part…
By Sara Tan

9 Ways This Royal Wedding Was Way More Modern Than Past Ones

The newly named Duke and Duchess of Sussex, Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, made history with their storybook courtship and wedding. What's more, there are myriad ways the royal wedding 2018 was more modern than previous royal weddings. From deciding…
By Brandi Neal

10 Little-Known British Traditions Meghan Markle Will Learn When She Marries Prince Harry

As an American woman dating a Brit, I am no stranger to the mishaps that can result from the cultural differences between the U.S. and England. And while I'm sure Meghan Markle has a slew of royal traditions to learn, titles to remember, and fancy ha…
By Kristin Magaldi

I've Paid $18,000 To A $24,000 Student Loan, & I Still Owe $24,000

It all became real the summer before my senior year of college. It was 2010, and my home phone still had a cord, which I wrapped around my fingers as I waited not-so-patiently for the apathetic representative on the other end to tell me the bad news …
By Kaitlyn Cawley

12 Personality Quizzes That Will Help You Determine Your Exact Strengths

Learning more about yourself can be tough. It's so easy to observe others to learn what makes them tick, what areas they really excel in, and the things they could be better at. Doing that to yourself, however, is a whole different story. That's exac…
By Jessica Booth

5 Brand New Short Story Collections You Can Finish In One Sitting This Weekend

Since 2013, May has been known by book-lovers by another name: Short Story Month. If you're ready to kick off this year's celebration the right way, make sure to pick up a short story collection to read over the weekend. Modern life moves more than …
By Sadie Trombetta

I Got Styled By 'Queer Eye's Tan France & Realized I Still Have A Lot Of Fashion "Rules" To Unlearn

When I walked into a New York City Express store on May 2 to get styled by Queer Eye's Tan France, I was ready for anything. And I mean truly anything. I am such a massive fan of the show and Tan that if he had instructed me to wrap myself in tin foi…
By Olivia Muenter

It Isn’t Bad To Have A “Princess Fantasy” — Mine Made Me The Woman I Am Today

What do you want to be when you grow up? If you were anything like me as a kid, at some point, the answer to that question was "a princess." Thanks to good old-fashioned gender stereotypes, most little girls born in the '90s (and even now) grew up in…
By Nicole Pomarico

Here’s How To Get A FREE 30-Minute Facial At Sephora That Sucks Your Pores Clean

Sephora has long been a mecca for both serious and amateur beauty lovers alike, where they not only have makeup artists that help answer questions about products, but free samples to let you play with new collections. But now they have upped the ante…
By Marlen Komar

Kris Jenner Is FINALLY Launching A Makeup Line With Kylie

Maybe you don't have a favorite sister of the Kar-Jenner clan, and that's perfectly fine. The one thing you can't deny, though, is that when it comes power, no one in that family has more than the world famous momager. Now, Kris Jenner x Kylie Cosmet…
By Shea Simmons

This Kendall Jenner “Diva” Moment Is Really Being Taken Out Of Context

The fashion always takes center stage at the Met Gala, but there's usually a little drama, too. And this time, a member of the Kardashian-Jenner family is involved. People are buzzing about how Kendall Jenner shoved someone at the Met Gala, but after…
By Nicole Pomarico

Feel Like You've Seen Everything On Netflix? Add These Movies To Your Watch List

The weekend may feel too far away, but if you're lacking formal plans, a Netflix marathon session is always a good idea. If you're an avid viewer, however, you probably feel like you've seen everything the streaming platform has to offer already. In …
By Ashley Rey

Hillary Clinton Says She's Ready To Fight Like A Republican — EXCLUSIVE

Hillary Clinton Is Not Going Away Quietly. Can Hillary Clinton Please Go Quietly Into The Night? Unlike Losers Before Her, Clinton Is Not Going Gently Into the Night. These headlines, which appeared in various news outlets over the course of the last…
By Catherine Thompson and Jenny Hollander

Here's The Very Best Time To Book Your Summer Vacation If You're Trying To Save Money

Summer is a great time to travel, for obvious reasons. The weather is better. Many offices are more lax about time off. If you have kids, they’re out of school. But there’s one very important element that makes summer not a great time to travel: Cost…
By Emma McGowan
)}