Entertainment

Justin Bieber Doesn't Wait in Lines

by Arielle Dachille

The Biebs in a wheelchair at a theme park is a definitely sight that qualifies as “something you don’t see every day.” TMZ reports that Justin Bieber was spotted at Disneyland in a wheelchair on Sunday, so fun seekers at the park certainly got their money’s worth. Bieber posed for a picture with a fan, sported a hat, and probably bypassed every line during his visit to Mickey’s birthplace. His line-cutting privileges are largely owed to the fact that he’s Justin Bieber, but riding around in a vehicle meant for the disabled or injured doesn’t hurt. Not one little bit.

Allegedly, Bieber was merely resting his legs to cope with a knee injury he sustained on the basketball court. Sure, because Bieber doesn’t play low-impact basketball with a flock of personally-funded friends who let him win, like, all the time. Still, I gotta hand it to you, Justin. You’re quick on your feet when caught being the mischievous little imp that you are. Though there's one thing I must request — Bieber should own his tomfoolery. Sure, he's capable of good deeds now and then, but he's basically the Bart Simpson of pop. Even if he weren’t famous, he’s just the type of punk kid to cut the line at an amusement part.

Let’s go over some of the tricks that Justin Bieber probably uses to avoid waiting to ride roller coasters. Even without his flock of bodyguards and attendants, he can do bad all by himself.

Renting a wheelchair

'Fess up, buddy. This trick is as old as time. I did it when I visited Epcot with my parents when I was six.

Distracting line-waiting normals his waddle-swagger

Create a diversion with your hip blade muscles and saunter up to the front undetected.

Wearing shades then making his move to the head of the line

Sunglasses double as a cloak of invisibility.

Feigning ignorance

What?? How'd I get ahead of you in line? Guess I was here the whole time...

Then, a good old fashioned Bieber wink

It's just like Sex Panther.

Denying it all together

Thinking of reporting him to park security? He didn't do it.

But really, at the end of the day, he cuts the line just by being Justin Bieber

Simple peons, Duke Bieber has no use for your petty lines! He has the divine right of pop stars to overstep any social boundaries meant to keep the plebs in order. Resistance is futile.

Images: Giphy (5)