TV & Movies

14 Fran Lebowitz Quotes That Will Change Your Perspective On Life

The author is the subject of Netflix's docuseries, Pretend It's a City.

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She exploded onto the literary scene with 1978's Metropolitan Life. Now, acerbic wit Fran Lebowitz is sure to pick up a new generation of fans with Pretend It's a City: a new Netflix series in which she discusses her life and times in roundtable discussions with Martin Scorsese.

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"I cannot stop for one second, or stand in front of a place smoking a cigarette, without 10 people instantly asking me directions. And I'm really surprised by this, because I always think, Really? Do I look welcoming to you?"

Pretend It's a City, episode 1

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"People our age came to New York... because you were gay.... That created a density of angry homosexuals, which is always good for a city. There’s nothing better for a city than a dense population of angry homosexuals."

Pretend It's a City, episode 2

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"There's only two kinds of people in the world: the kind of people who think there's such a thing as enough money and the kind of people who have money."

Pretend It's a City, episode 4

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"It's impossible to be a satirist in this era. It would stump Jonathan Swift."

Pretend It's a City, episode 3

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"I think it's unbelievable that there's a phrase such as 'guilty pleasure.' Unless your pleasure is killing people. My pleasures are absolutely benign, by which I mean, no one dies. No one is molested. No, I don’t feel guilty for having pleasure."

Pretend It's a City, episode 6

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"About one-third of the people in the street in New York City have a yoga mat. That alone would keep me from yoga. Carrying around a little rolled-up rug.... You know, New York used to be much more fashionable than that."

Pretend It's a City, episode 5

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"As far as wanting to go places, I can’t believe people do it for fun. When I’m in airports, and I see people going on vacations, I think, How horrible could your life be?"

Pretend It's a City, episode 3

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"I am absolutely, a hundred percent, incapable of throwing a book away.... To me, a book is really the closest thing to a human being."

Pretend It's a City, episode 7

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"What's amazing about the Chrysler Building is the detail and how beautiful it is.... To me, it's the perfect size for a house for one."

Pretend It's a City, episode 4

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"I have known... only one really, really good writer in my life who loves to write. Only one.... Most people who love to write are horrible writers, so of course they love to write."

Pretend It's a City, episode 2

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"[Little children] are the least annoying [group of people], because they are the least likely to tell you something you've heard a million times. They're not yet filled with clichés. They're more original than adults."

Pretend It's a City, episode 6

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"Your bad habits can kill you, I've seen that. but your good habits won't save you."

Pretend It's a City, episode 5

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"There are certain kinds of snobberies that I think are bad. Of course, those are not the kind of snobberies that I have."

Pretend It's a City, episode 1

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"In books, you have a zillion lives.... This may be the reason I never cared about money. Because as soon as you can read, you are incredibly rich. So rich that, if you read all the time, you wouldn't have time to think about money."

Pretend It's a City, episode 7