Heading out for your freshman year of college is an exciting time, filled with plenty of opportunities — and by opportunities, I mean people to date. You'll be scoping out fellow naive undergrads from the moment you start to unpack your luggage, but listen to me before numbers and emojis are exchanged — there are many, many people you shouldn't date during your first year of college.
Do I sound like a downer? Surely. But trying to lock down a dude within the first semester is often a goal filled with much trial, and copious error. When you're a junior, you'll look back at those guys, and wonder what you were thinking. Please, let me spare you the disgusting nostalgia, so you won't waste your time.
See, here's the thing. Guys are equally excited about their dating prospects in college, and the enthusiasm over getting the girl will probably lead to a lot of teen boy behavior. Remember, these guys only learned how to drive a car a handful of years ago, so their emotional maturity isn't at the level you assume it is. If you go into the college dating pool with some advice, you're less likely to get hurt.
Here are a few examples of the guys you probably won't want to get serious with.
1. The Guy Who Lives In Your Dorm
Two words: Awkward breakup. Sure, it might be convenient to live a floor or two apart, but if it's not a match made in heaven, little things like doing your laundry will suddenly become a nerve-wracking task. In college, it's a nerve-wracking task as is. (Pro tip: Just don't use bleach.) Also, if you see him bring another girl to the dorm, your jealousy meter might go off the charts.
Everyone deserves a place to feel safe, without judgment. Your dorm hall should be that place.
2. The Guy Who Kind Of Has A Girlfriend Back Home
So, he kinda sorta broke up with her before he left, but he still texts her every other day. He visits home a lot, but they only made out because it was familiar to them. No, he's totally a single guy! But be careful about posting those group photos on Facebook, OK? His ex might start asking questions.
This guy still has ties back home, and if you keep convincing yourself that he'll cut ties with his old girlfriend for you, you're bound to get hurt. End it before he breaks your heart. You deserve someone who is 100 percent available. Seriously.
3. The Guy Who'll Hook You Up With Alcohol
Speaking of booze, many freshmen seem to find an upperclassman who'll buy them a bottle of alcohol, no questions asked. While it could be a good hookup to have, it shouldn't lead to a love connection. I mean, think about it — it's a little skeevy.
While I trust you'll drink responsibly and watch your cup closely if you choose to drink, way too many college women have been victimized after a night of alcohol. Make sure this guy is a decent guy, and doesn't expect any kind of "payment" in return for his deed.
I mean, buying you alcohol is kinda sorta illegal. Remember that, too.
4. The Guy Who Is In, Like, Four Of Your Classes
You start crushing on him since you see him a bunch of times during the week. If you connect based on similar schedules, getting to know him will be super easy. This could be amazing, right?
Eh, not so much. Again, if you choose to date and you don't connect on a romantic level, you're stuck seeing this guy a bunch of times during the week. If you're the one who ended things, there's a chance he'll still be stuck on you, which may lead to a few bumbling future encounters.
If he seems great, get to know him, and maybe try to pursue things next semester.
5. The Guy Who Goes Home Every Weekend
So, campus is like, an hour away from home. It's ideal, since you can visit your family during the weekend, and also prevent a lot of random "mom and dad stopped by unannounced, since they miss their baby girl!" moments. When you first start college, it's tempting to surround yourself by the familiar when you get a chance. But trust me — don't do it.
The weekends are the perfect time to adjust to your new surroundings. They're great for checking out all of the resources your college offers, and perhaps find hidden gems that you didn't uncover during your initial college tour. So, keep this in mind when you fall for the "suitcase college" kid — they're not really embracing the experience.
If he goes home every weekend, he doesn't know how to do his own laundry. And he doesn't feel comfortable testing out his fully formed social skills with different mixes of people. He wants someone to take care of him, which isn't a great trait for a future boyfriend.
Obviously this point is null if he has a sick parent, or a huge obligation back at home. That's just him being a nice guy.
6. The Guy Who Tries Too Hard To Prove His Intellect
You know the type — he likes to raise his hand in class, and inform other students of his vast knowledge about... whatever. He doesn't even need to read the textbook — he learned this stuff on his own, years ago.
You might be impressed at first, but believe me. You'll never be right in this relationship. This guy will always try to be the "superior" one of the two, and pretty soon, you'll question every action you make. The guy who'll always try to one-up you will make a terrible boyfriend. Nobody wants to date a know-it-all.
Plus, part of the college experience is the ability to truly define yourself. Why date someone who'll try to define that for you?
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