Entertainment

Want To Be A Pokemon Trainer?

by Katherine Cusumano

'Gotta catch em all' has never been so close to a reality. The trailer for the new Nintendo app Pokémon GO dropped this morning, and the action isn't strictly limited to your phone. Though it remains to be seen how exactly this will work, the app seems to promise PokéBattles in real time, and the program will access your phone's GPS in order to hunt Pokémon that populate the hills and cities of our own planet.

The trailer features players wandering around in search of Pokémon in alleys and underbrush, though the game's action will really happen on iOS and Android when the app goes live. Users will also have bracelets with PokéBall buttons, allowing them to swiftly capture Pokémon within a certain radius without having to go through all the trouble of pulling out their phones.

The trailer then culminates in a massive face-off in Times Square, where thousands of players gather to watch a showdown with Mewtwo. Other cameo appearances include Pikachu and Charizard, but who knows — there could be so many more Pokémon living among us. The trailer below is pretty emotionally exhausting (it's a whole three-minute odyssey), but its many brief flashes of favorite Pokémon makes me wonder, which Pokémon would I most like to see take up residence in the nooks and crannies on my block?

1. Bulbasaur

I've always had a soft spot for the tubby, dinosaur-meets-turtle-meets-potted plant that is Bulbasaur. Is he the most useful in a high-pressure, battle situation? Absolutely not. But what he lacks in power he makes up in charm.

2. Psyduck

If, like Psyduck, my headaches gave me supernatural psychic powers, I'd be in such good shape. A real-life Psyduck might be able to give some pointers on how to channel my brainwaves.

3. Jigglypuff

Precious, if menacing with her soporific powers.

4. Horsea

The chubby little seahorse Horsea can squirt a spray of water, or a jet of black ink, at any attackers. Horsea is apparently also a foot and a half tall, so possibly a bit easier to spot than its mundane ocean-dwelling counterpart.

5. Ponyta

Perhaps the successor to the Shetland Pony in the hearts and minds of children everywhere.

6. Eevee

Bulbapedia says that she is rarely found in the wild, so a real-life Eevee might be the newest trendy pet. But with all that fur, can a person be allergic to a Pokémon?

7. Snorlax

Nintendo beat Hayao Miyazaki in the race to the real world, so Snorlax is a consolation prize if I can't have a real-life Totoro.

8. Sunflora

A Pokémon I'd love to grow in my aspirational garden.

9. Chandelure

I'm kind of curious about the physics of this one, to be honest. And how fabulous would that look as the centerpiece of a dining table when I have all the other trainers over for a potluck.

The Pokémon GO trailer sets a pretty high standard for my aspirations to live out my fantasy as a Pokémon trainer. These nine would be the first in my arsenal (which, admittedly, is a lot more about style than function — we're not winning any battles here), but there are 719 Pokémon to bring into the world. Nintendo, we're counting on you.

Images: Giphy (9)