7 Hilarious Late Night Jokes About Donald Trump That'll Make You Do A Spit Take (Probably With Your Oreos)
Donald Trump is the presidential candidate that late night television hosts have been absolutely dreaming of. The GOP front-runner is bombastic, highly quotable, and has provided enough material to fill an entire season of talk shows. Ever since announcing his candidacy in June, the Donald has provided incredible fodder for the likes of Jimmy Kimmel, Jimmy Fallon, Seth Meyers, and more. What the country's truly looking forward to, however, is the candidate's appearance on The Late Show With Stephen Colbert on Tuesday night. And the best late night jokes about Donald Trump are the ultimate way to pregame before his appearance.
For his part, Trump has been an incredibly game participant and hasn't called out a single evening program for unfairly portraying him. He's even made a late night appearance and was interviewed by Fallon on The Tonight Show. Fallon assumed his role as Trump impersonator and pretended to have the Donald interview himself. The two also sat down for a traditional Q&A as well. Even then, Trump was jovial. Away from a late night set, the real estate mogul is a whole other person, issuing angry tweets and making baseless claims about everything from immigration to foreign policy. That has somehow positioned Trump as the top GOP candidate currently with 23 percent popularity, according to a poll commissioned by Hot Air and Townhall Media Group.
Pros & Cons
Even as Trump was considering running for president, he was fast entering the monologues and segments of late night hosts around the country. A pros and cons segment on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon summed the best and worst the candidate has to offer in an incredibly hilarious way. When looking all the way ahead to the Republican candidate actually becoming president, Fallon offered this pro and con:
Pro: Seeing Trump move into the White House. Con: Seeing him try to flip it for twice its value.
The Escalator Joke
When the Donald did finally announce his candidacy, it was broadcast on Fox News in what the host of Late Night With Seth Meyers described as essentially just as engaging as "Fox News calling a rain delay." Meyers' best joke about the pomp and circumstance surrounding a Trump announcement came just as the candidate had descended with his wife from an escalator in Trump Tower:
Riding down an escalator is not the most presidential way to make an entrance. Are you going to make a speech or are you going to baggage claim?
Colbert has already gotten some incredible jokes in on Trump but none were as satisfying as his dedicated segment on what Trump had to say about Oreos. The anti-immigration candidate was livid when he said during an Alabama rally that Nabisco decided to close down a plant in Chicago and instead move it Mexico, vowing to never eat Oreos again. Forbes reports that the stateside plant isn't closing, however — it's just slashing hundreds of jobs. Colbert decided to pick up Trump's slack and eat mass amounts of the cookies while detailing some of the more ridiculous things the GOP front-runner had to say about immigration. He even offered his own genius suggestion to Trump regarding his infamous border wall idea:
A border wall could not be simpler. Just build a 95 story building and knock it over 10,000 times. Then you keep the Mexicans out with a doorman.
Pros & Cons Part 2
Fallon once again returned with another pros and cons list, this time on attending a Trump rally. Now that Trump's campaign is in full swing, it only makes sense that The Tonight Show host wax poetic on his many political appearances. Seeing the Donald in person is a great way to gauge his politics, as Fallon highlighted. Perhaps his best pro and con came from alluding to — you guessed it — his thoughts on immigrants. Fallon said:
Pro: hearing his plan on how to prevent our biggest threat from invading the U.S. Con: realizing he's talking about Minions.
Trump isn't the only political figure currently leading in the polls, according to Colbert. Highlighting the Donald's high popularity, the late night host brought up a focus group study where 29 pro-Trump Americans discussed their thoughts on the GOP frontrunner. One participant had indicated that "we know his [Trump's] goal is to make America great again ... it's on his hat." Colbert immediately latched onto the comment, considering it the ultimate political move:
That's how you can tell who people really are: the hat. That's why you know the creepy guy on the beach is a real female body inspector. ... If you [other candidates] want to have any hope of ever catching up with Donald Trump, I am strongly advising you to explain your campaigns using only headgear.
Donald Trump On The Phone
Late Night With Seth Meyers finally got to the core of an issue that has long troubled political junkies and viewers of news-focused morning talk shows — the sheer prevalence of Trump's phone interviews. "Is there anyone who calls into more shows than Donald Trump," Meyers wonders, before a lengthy montage of Trump calls rolls. The host instead asks his audience to imagine just what exactly it is while the Republican candidate calls into each show:
He's probably on a Bluetooth — excuse me, a gold tooth — but what is he doing when he's on these calls. Is he standing in front of a wall of TVs waiting for someone to mention his name? Is he putting golf balls into one of those Sharper Image things that shoots the golf ball back? Is he lying face down in a massage table while two women hit him in the back with bamboo sticks?
Finally, Jimmy Kimmel Live provided the ultimate montage — clips featuring the many, many times Trump has used the word "disgusting." The footage comes after a lawyer alleging the candidate had used that word to shame her in a courtroom setting to shame her by calling her disgusting for requesting a break to pump breast milk. Kimmel used the scandal and clips to highlight the Donald's hypocrisy. The candidate admitted in an interview with Greta Van Susteren that his biggest weakness is people's perception that he's mean. "Some people think I'm not a nice person and I actually am. I love people," Trump said. Kimmel, however, shows that Trump really isn't, using his signature dry humor:
That doesn't sound like the thoughtful, gentle, mild-mannered Donald Trump I know. I can't even imagine him using that word.