Guys, it's sweater weather! Oh, wait, psych. It's pretty toasty outside for much of the US of A right now (unless you're in New York, you lucky ducks), and that's super disappointing for mid-October. I'm sure I'm not the only one who goes through these emotional stages of wanting to wear fall sweaters when it still feels like summer outside. Sob.
I look forward to this time of year more than any other season, and I gotta say, this 80-something degree weather is seriously killing my vibe. All I want to do is enjoy my Toasted Graham Latte from Starbucks and watch all of the Harry Potter movies while wearing a big, cozy sweater. Is that too much to ask?
Weather, it's time to get with the program. How can you expect me to choose the perfect pumpkin without a festive scarf on? And crunchy leaves just aren't as satisfying when you're wearing flip flops and shorts. I know that summer weather is supposed to put you in a good mood, but right now, it's actually bumming me out.
What about baking? What about long yoga pants? What about blankets? What about hot chocolate? I've just about had it with this heat, because my favorite things about fall just aren't the same when there's no crisp air to go with them — especially sweaters. Oh, how I long for you.
Here are the 11 emotional stages of wanting to wear a sweater when the forecast has other plans.
1. Getting Annoyed At Your Weather(wo)man
84 degrees today? Are you kidding me? Next channel. I'm boycotting this ish.
2. Facing A Wardrobe Dilemma
Welp, guess my giant black turtleneck will have to wait.
3. Dealing With Discomfort
Can't a girl wear a lightweight cardigan without turning it into a sweat lodge? Come on.
4. Having Concern For The Future Of Fall
Is this how things are going to be from now on? I swear, I'll recycle and turn off my lights and go ultra-green if it means I can keep my autumn weather.
5. Quitting The Heat
I give up. Back inside I go.
6. Blasting Your AC
Just because it's an oven outside doesn't mean I can't be chilly inside. This is my house.
7. Denying The Temperature
Happy fall, everyone! *Puts pumpkin muffins in oven, lights cinnamon candle, wears four sweaters*
8. Enjoying The Whole "Ignorance Is Bliss" Thing
I'm never going outside again. I'm going to close all my blinds and pretend it is a crisp fall day.
9. Reluctantly Going Back Outside
Ugh, I guess I have to tend to my responsibilities and face the fact that it's still 85 degrees outside.
10. Wearing A Sweater Anyways
You know what? I can handle it. I'll wear a sweater if I want to because I am a grown-up.
11. Accepting That It's Just Not Sweater Weather
Maybe tomorrow. Fingers crossed, guys.
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