Making strange and inexplicable online purchases while plastered just got easier, thanks to DrunkMall, a website for all your drunk shopping needs. Like SkyMall for the alcohol infused, DrunkMall scours the vast corners of the Internet to find objects that hit your “I’m drunk and I NEED that”/“Just how drunk was I?” sweet spot. The site’s slogan? “Take 2 aspirin and check your credit card statement in the morning.”
DrunkMall was created by Tyler Mahan Coe, who told The Cut how he came up with the website: "It was a pure 'Eureka!' moment out of nowhere, honestly. As soon as I realized it didn't already exist, I knew I had to create it and people instantly loved it." DrunkMall’s carefully curated selection falls into a number of categories for drunk purchases:
- Things that have to do with food. (It’s no surprise that many of these items are breakfast-centric).
- Things that are legit awesome (Cough cough Bill Murray shower curtain cough).
- Things that are stupidly expensive.
- Things that are stupidly large.
- Things that are simply stupid. (IN A GOOD WAY).
Here are a few of my favorite DrunkMall selections. TBH, I probably wouldn’t even need to be drunk to buy some of these treasures. (I’m looking at you, pizza cones).
Self-balancing, Hands-free scooter
Pizza Cone Kit
Zombie Garden Gnome
Light Up Tutu
Breakfast Sandwich Machine
Netflix and Chill Condoms
Netflix and Chill, $9.99
The Always Crunchy Never Soggy Cereal Bowl
The Wine Rack, a wine-holding sports bra
Bill Murray Shower Curtain
Society 6, $68.00
Pepperoni Pizza Bedspread
3,000 Jazz Waxed Paper Cups
Life-sized Cardboard Thor
Shark's Head Wall Mount
An 8-foot long, 26 pound Gummi Snake