Wait... This Dude Gets to Bed Sofia Vergara?

Listen up middle-aged straight men everywhere: Dreams really do come true. That is, if you're a character in a film starring Woody Allen. Fading Gigolo, is about a man who Woody Allen commissions to be a prostitute. And as if sleeping with women for money isn't a heck of a deal as it is, what if the women you were being paid to bed were Sofia Vergara, Vanessa Paradis and Sharon Stone? Then my friend, you've hit the jackpot. Such is life in the hilarious (and oh so fictitious) trailer for Allen's latest, where the stories protagonist seems to be as lucky as ever in bed, and love. Starring John Turturro as the normal dude turned Don Juan and Woody Allen as the best friend and prostitution instigator, the film is also written and directed by Turturro.

"So this is what you do?" Asks one of his clients over dinner.

"Guess so."

"Bring magic to the lonely," the client coos. Add "magic" to the short list of Other Words that Mean Orgasm.

Fading Gigolo hits theatres on April 18th. Watch the trailer in all of its hilarity below: