Ever since fourth grade where my entire class was lined up tallest to shortest and noticed that I was a head taller than all the girls and even eight percent of the boys, I’ve been in a love-hate relationship with my height. I think everyone has that ~one thing~ they would like to change about themselves, and mine was always my height. That is until I woke up one morning and thought to myself how crazy it is to be ashamed of something that not only was out of my control, but something that made me individual and unique. I've learned to appreciate sticking out a little, and if anyone is intimidated by a tall girl, that is THEIR problem, and not mine.
The truth is that being tall is the tops. Being in the top percentile of height is the most swag-tastic statistic you can be in. And ladies, being tall has a set of perks you have not thought about enough. And you should start thinking about it. Get in touch with yourself and show some self-love, because you have a very special gift. So if you are ever feeling a little self-conscious, just think about all of the points below until you feel better:
1. Being Tall Means More Organizational Space
If your room looks like a war zone between your closet and your desk, it might be time to invest into shelving units. Your clothes and office supplies will suddenly separate into organized bunches that you can easy pick up without having to dig through piles. And guess what? You can get cool looking shelves that are out of the way because you can reach really high. All because of your height. Mazel tov.
2. You Save Hella Money On Dresses
When you are tall, floor length means floor length, not "some-place-under-your-shoe" length — and which means you get to save money and time on getting that sucker hemmed. You won the lottery because your dry cleaner's bill will be nonexistent.
3. Drive Through Windows
Do you know how awkward drive though windows can be?! You drive up to the window to grab the food only to see that your car is pretty far away. You can't back up because there are people behind you, so you are stuck. BUT WAIT. You are tall. Which usually means long arms. You can reach out of your window, grab the food, and be out of there without breaking a sweat. Your milkshake is safely inside the car and not on the floor. #Blessed.
4. Concert Part 1: Front Row Crotch Shot
Ever been to a concert? Have you ever been in the front row? Chances are, if you are lucky enough to be that close, you will have to deal with the repercussions. Meaning, more than likely you will have to be faced with the performers crotch being on eye level with you. Unless...YOU'RE TALL. When you are tall, you will not be subjected to an eyeful of HELLO. You will most likely be closer to the belly button or belt line. That's a win for everyone.
5. Concert Part 2: Seeing Is Seeing
Let's face it, if you are in the crowd during the concert you most likely WON'T be right by the stage. But you came to see Dave Mathews Band, dammit, so thats what you will get! And lucky for you, your height means you actually get to see them belt out their greatest hit like_______ (please hold while I Google... there we go... yup... good, good, good — got it) their greatest hit like Crash Into Me.
6. You Can Ride All The Rides
The thought of worry over not being able to get on a roller coaster hasn't entered your mind since you were eight years old. You are king of the theme park.
7. Cash Money, Y'all
There was a scientific study that took a look at people's heights and how much money they make, and apparently if you're taller, you tend to make more money than people who aren't. Hello Burning Man, here I come!
8. No Need For Heels
You never have to worry about putting on a pair of heels to help make yourself a bit taller. You are tall enough. But when you do put on a pair... you're basically invincible.
9. People Tend To Listen To You
You command attention when you walk into the room. You can't help it. And why should you?! You deserve to be heard. Whether it's in the bar screaming for your friend to grab you a beer, or in a boardroom, you will get the proper level of attention you need. Use it wisely!
10. Lightbulbs Are A Breeze
It's almost like you just have to reach up and everything works out perfectly. You can read in peace without having to call a handyman with a stepladder.
11. You Are A Hug Machine
Being tall means you give the kinds of hugs that make people feel safe and loved. Thats a power that many humans wish they had. They pay Deepak Chopra money for the same feels he can only provide with words!
12. You Are Never Late
Being tall means having long legs. Your walks are brisk and to the point! You are never late because you had to park the car four blocks away.
13. Kissing Is The Bomb
If you end up dating someone as tall as you, there's no neck craning. No sore calf muscle. No back tension. Your kisses are face-to-face.
14. No One Will Mistake Your Significant Other For A Parent
This one doesn't need further explaining. Basically you're on the "totally fine" side of the Greek tragedy scale.
15. You Slay At Maxi Dresses
You never need to pinch and lift them when walking up or down stairs in order not to trip.
You can be the big spoon or the little spoon. Either way, you're killing the spooning game.
17. Best Seat In The Car
You are never made to sit in the back because your legs can't bend that way. Instead you will be right by the driver, enjoying all the luxurious room you want. (Suckers.)