15 Ways Your Relationship With Your Mom Changes As You Mature
Mother-daughter relationships are always going to be complicated. Even when we're as young as elementary schoolers, the way we interact with our mother is starkly different than our dads or any other family member. Moms are the ones we run to when we're tired or hungry, yet they're the first ones we blame when something goes wrong. We worry them to death without even realizing it, and then we wonder why they become so exasperated with us.
There's a reason we're still obsessed with Rory and Lorelai Gilmore, years after Gilmore Girls came to a close. Their imperfect, bizarre relationship touched our hearts forever, and we witnessed so many things happen between them that we can relate to on a deeply personal level. One second you were laughing, and the next you were sobbing like a baby. I don't know about you, but that's pretty much my relationship with my mom in a nutshell.
In many ways, the way we are with our mothers isn't so different than the Gilmores, except for the fact that the wackiness continues way longer than seven seasons. We'll live through the ups and downs until the day we die, and no matter how hard it gets, we wouldn't trade it for the world.
1. You Take Her Advice More Often
The phrase "Mother knows best" doesn't come from nowhere, but when you're in the middle of your first high school breakup you don't want to hear a word of what she's got to say. Time eventually teaches you that your mom offers pretty solid guidance. Brace yourself: you might actually find yourself actively seeking out her advice.
2. ... And You're Not Afraid To Give Her Advice
With all the education and experience you've gained over the years, you might end up being the one who doles out financial advice, perhaps in relation to her retirement plans. Remember those days when she taught you about how to spend your allowance? You've come full circle.
3. You Sometimes Learn To Disagree Without Fighting
No matter how old you are, there will always be a moment when the two of you don't see eye to eye on things. In your younger years, the simplest of disagreements would result in throwing hair dryers across the house. But that's much less likely to happen now (hopefully).
4. The Things That Used To Embarrass You Make You Laugh
The way my mom talks about current trends and celebrities is like a comedy routine to me these days, yet that same routine used to nearly humiliate me to tears. Then, of course, there are the embarrassing hugs and kisses they plant on us in public. As kids, that was gross. As emotionally-depraved adults who are trying to figure out their direction in life, it's awesome.
5. You Become More Interested In Her Skincare Routine
You were too busy fighting acne to be concerned with all the serums and cremes sitting in her medicine cabinet back in the day — but heaven knows you simply can't get enough of them now. You want to know all about the elixirs that have kept her skin glowing all these years, and you want to sample them all out every time you come home to visit.
6. You Better Understand Her Drinking Habits
After enduring more than one uncomfortable holiday season with your extended family as a grown-ass woman, you will never again question your mother's nightcaps. All you can do is look back at your innocent tween self and shake your head at how judgmental she was.
7. You Want To Borrow The Clothes You Once Hated
Her elegant style was too put-together for your angsty teenage soul. But today you'll do anything to get your hands on the vintage blazer that's been sitting in her closet for years. You may even find yourself begging her to let you take home a whole section of her wardrobe that you're convinced will be much happier in your apartment.
8. You're More Likely To Exercise Together
Admit it, going to yoga with your mom is fun. You set up your mats next to each other and fervently gossip until the teacher walks in, then go to lunch on a mutual endorphin high. (As if you would have never done anything of the sort years ago, though.)
9. You Don't Mind Doing Jobs Around The House You Used To Hate
Spring cleaning, cooking for the family, craft projects — all of these things used to be a royal pain in the butt, but they've become productive ways to spend your limited time together. Because you actually want to talk to your mom these days, these projects are perfect. They give you the time and space to chat away.
10. When Your Family Teases Her You're More Likely To Stick Up For Her
As a kid, it's fun for you and your sibling to poke fun at Mama for her weird habits. But you're much more protective of her quirks than ever before, maybe because you realize as you get older that you possess those same exact traits. So now, you don't let anyone get away with teasing your sweet mother about the way she eats those tiny cubes of cheese.
11. You Listen More To What She Says About Your Significant Other
Moms will always be honest about the people we're dating — it's in their DNA. How we take it is a different story. Our young, sensitive selves weren't so great at hearing the truth about how often our new bae ignores us in public, but it seems that we crave our mother's feedback more as we age. They see things that we'll never be able to; no reason to waste that kind of wisdom.
12. You Care Less And Less If She Sees You Cry
I used to hate shedding any tears in front of my mom. I wanted her to leave me alone so I could cry in peace. Today, she's the first person I call when I'm wildly upset about something. I don't care how old we get — nobody can ease tears like a mother.
13. You Curse More Freely In Front Of Each Other
Life is so much more fun when we get to that point in our adult lives when she can finally be herself in front of us — F-bombs and all.
14. It's Easier To Talk About Sex & Pregnancy
Finally, we can chat about sex without the blushing and the mortifying lectures! You and your mom have earned it. You don't need to censor any info about your IUD anymore, especially if she's inquiring a little too much about when you're going to have babies.
15. You're Both More Comfortable Talking About Mistakes You've Made
We see our mommies as perfect human beings when we're little ones. They're our heroes, and they hardly do us wrong. Our relationship gains a new dimension, though, when we reach adulthood and can finally admit to each other that we've messed up, whether it's in our relationship or in other areas of life. And honestly, talking about it feels so good.
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