Chipotle Is Making TV Now, 'Idiocracy' WAS REAL

Remember when the move Idiocracy came out back in 2006 and everyone was all, "wow, this makes a really good point about the future of our society, which is terrifying, but hey, at least Luke Wilson arrives to save the day?" Well, it's only 2014, but with the news that Chipotle is now making a web series about factory farming, it's become official, the world as we know it is turning into the world that Luke Wilson arrives in a casual 442 years from now.

Chipotle, a brand whose public message and promotional work is largely to do with the wrongs of factory farming has, and here's a shocker, made a show about the wrongs of factory farming. A web series, to be exact, which is funded by a food chain whose values eerily align with the very subject of satire the series engages. Uh... yeah. Good-bye future innovation and science, hello Big Brother and President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho. I'm so scared.

I mean, the whole wire-tapping, NSA-knows-everything-about-you ordeal is one thing, but this, television made by corporations for the explicit purpose of self promotion, is a scary step toward a world full of people who literally cannot reason through why a square peg does not fit in a round role. Idiocracy satirizes the idea that privatization will turn the whole world into blathering idiots, but honestly, look around you folks, because we are quickly headed toward mountains of garbage and bar-code identifiers.

I'm even gonna throw in a little Josie and The Pussycats reference here and say that while we are watching, there is probably some sort of subconscious brain-washing going on at the same time. What you think you're seeing is a comedy on Hulu, but underneath the images is the word "burrito" written a billion times. Not that we needed prompting to eat Chipotle burritos anyway, but aaaahhh, everything is going corporate, even television shows.

Now maybe you're thinking, "oh, but there is so much product placement and so many commercials anyway, is this that different?" YES. IT REALLY IS. Sure, many networks and film studios get money from large corporations to make their goods look cool, but at least in that case there is a middle man, a middle man with the viewer's enjoyment in mind. This is something else entirely. Yes, factory farming is very very bad, and yes, it is really lovely that Chipotle is so openly against it, but cozying up to the organic-food nuts of the world by making organically sourced burritos is good, lucrative business, as well as responsible farming. Let's not forget, Chipotle was originally owned by McDonalds, so whatever "home-grown, just like your maw and paw raised on the farm" shit they're peddling now in terms of where they get their meat is probably what it seems: excellent brand management.

So although the chief marketing and development officer at Chipotle, Mark Crumpacker, has said that they view this show as "a values-integration rather than typical product-integration,” DO NOT BELIEVE HIM. If you do, we might actually be giving away Oscars to moves like Ass in only a few years time, and I am not okay with that, not even a little bit. Because as far as we know, they haven't put Luke Wilson away in a time capsule yet to come save us from ourselves, and where the fuck will we be without Luke Wilson? Nowhere guys, absolutely nowhere.

Image: 20th C. Fox