The Housewives' Lessons About How NOT To Argue

The Real Housewives franchise has had some iconic reality TV arguments. A lot has gone down over the years and I've been watching it all from the very beginning — on repeat — and I've even learned a lesson or two. By no means, am I saying to follow these women's examples when it comes to handling confrontation. In fact, what I'm really saying is the exact opposite, because the Real Housewives have taught a lot of lessons about what not to do in an argument over the years. I don't think that I would ever have a natural inclination to flip a table at a nice restaurant, but now that I see how it can play out, I know for sure that it is not the best move to make — ever.

Sure, all of these moves made for great TV, but they also made for some extremely uncomfortable real life situations. I have no idea why anyone would ever do some of the things the Housewives have done, because for these women and it did not end well at all. If you're going to get inspiration from the Real Housewives for conflict resolution, it should never be for what to do in an argument, but what you should never, ever do.

1. Flip Tables

There is no turning back once someone flips a table. You can always apologize when you say something out of turn, but when you flip a table, there's a mess everywhere, broken glassware, and some scared companions.

2. Throw Wine

Throwing wine is something I never understood. Why would you waste good wine on someone you don't even like? Oh, and it's also really rude and probably burns the eyes.

3. Make Condescending Hand Gestures

As if talking down to someone isn't bad enough, adding some condescending motions is the icing on the cake when it comes to insulting a person.

4. Give Someone The Evil Eye

It's still super unclear to me how "giving the evil eye" is different from just making eye contact with a person or shooting them a dirty look. But, if you know how to give the evil eye, don't ever do it. If you don't know what the evil is, then I suggest not looking at anyone just to be safe. It's better to be awkward than to be offensive, right?

5. Slap Anyone In The Face

Violence is never the answer, so this one is pretty obvious.

6. Rip Someone's Hair Out

Ditto.

7. Kick Someone

Ditto again. Thankfully, Porsha and Cynthia were able to settle their difference pretty quickly after their boat-kicking incident.

8. Tug On A Wig

Whether someone has real hair or faux, you should leave it alone.

9. Call Someone "Garbage"

Using the word "garbage" is a surefire way to get someone heated. If you want a fight to go from zero to 100, this is the way to do it.

10. Throw Artificial Limbs

'Nuff said.

11. Call Someone "Dumb"

Calling someone dumb is a guaranteed way to make them super angry. Do not do this if you don't think you can handle the consequences.

12. Make Religious Insults

It is never a good idea to throw around religious words casually, let alone in an insulting manner.

13. Call Someone "Honey"

If someone is mad at you, it is never a good idea to refer to them using terms of endearment.

14. Wake Someone Up

I don't get how someone could be so mad that they are willing to wake someone up to start an argument. Why would you ever unleash anger on someone who just woke up?

15. Tell A Person To Calm Down

If you want to make someone extremely angry, try telling them not to be angry.

16. Run Away Mid-Argument

If you can't deal with the situation at hand, then you should probably excuse yourself or ask to talk at another time. Not literally run away.

17. Tell Someone To Pay Attention

This isn't something that I've ever seen in real life, but it is a cardinal sin among Real Housewives, so I'm sure that there are other people who would be offended if you ask them to pay attention.

18. Make Scrambled Eggs In The Middle Of A Fight

When your friends are in the middle of an argument, they do not want to hear anything outside of that. Walking up to them in the middle with a plate of scrambled eggs is not going to be well-received.

The women on Real Housewives have a lot of great qualities, but effective conflict resolution is not one of them. If you want to know what not to do in an argument, then just do the opposite of what the Housewives would do and you'll be fine.

Images: Bravo (1); Giphy (2); RealityTVGIFs/Tumblr (16)