Ralph Lauren Collection RTW Fall 2014: A Glamorous Upper East Side Winter

Ralph Lauren can be a little red-white-and-blue-yeehaw for my taste sometimes (see: our fair country's Olympic uniforms), but Thursday's show was a far cry from his suntanned, preppy, Kennedy-esque roots. Instead, Lauren gave us a breath of cold air in the middle of winter; a study in icy glamour.

Though The Cut is criticizing Lauren's collection for being oblivious to the harsh realities of winter weather, I found the show to be the polar opposite — these clothes are winter personified, in all her feathery, chilly, pale beauty. A few of the outfits were a little stuffy — and the Ralph Lauren Polo collection, also shown Friday, was full of predictably cutesy, Southwestern-inspired, ultra-wearable Americana — but the Collection itself, all in dove gray, pale pink, and white, was what took my (frozen) breath away.

Images: Getty Images

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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A true snow queen doesn’t fear bare shoulders.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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World’s hippest mother of the bride outfit.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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Real flappers wear their spines on the outside.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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It’s not just a power suit, it’s a power lifestyle.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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Monochrome is for rich people.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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Cleavage is for ordinary people.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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Bras are for boring people.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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After a life of blue collar crime, Bonnie (of Bonnie & Clyde) switched over to to white-collar.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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It’s never too early for a ruff.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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The bigger the cape, the closer to Cape Cod.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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Who said CEOs can’t wear jumpsuits?

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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The Oscars are for amateurs.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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There’s that famed simplicity that only money can buy.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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You called?

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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Business up top, party (at the Plaza) down below.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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Coffee run.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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Babysitting gig.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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She made all her money at Studio 54, but we don’t mention those days.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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Bored with all-white everything? Just add fur.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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She’d never dream of letting her hair down, so her scarf does all the talking.

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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Money can definitely buy embellishments — but does it want to?

Ralph Lauren RTW Fall 2014

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She liked her capes like she liked her men: gray and trailing behind her.