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Stephen Colbert Pays Tribute To The Fallen GOP
On Wednesday night, Stephen Colbert made a toast to the Republicans in true Hunger Games style. Colbert dressed like Caesar Flickerman with his champagne glass and blue hair — just like the master of ceremonies in the Hunger Games trilogy who covers every aspect of the Games, from "natural" disasters in the arena to fallen tributes. In the Late Show version, the Hungry for Power Games, Colbert toasts the GOP's fallen tributes.
Colbert, in his Flickerman manner, said, "In the past few months, friends, we've lost so many brave tributes. Today, we lost what many are calling more of them." Poking fun at Ohio Gov. John Kasich ending his campaign — it didn't pick up nearly as much traction as businessman Donald Trump or even Texas Sen. Ted Cruz — Colbert said, "John Kasich has ended his bid for the White House. He may be gone, but he's not — who are we talking about again?" In the true way of the Hunger Games, Colbert gave us a look back at Kasich's campaign triumphs, before saying our final goodbye. Colbert took us back to Kasich's win in Ohio, and said, "There was Ohio, and he's gone," before blowing Kasich's campaign a Flickerman kiss goodbye. Poor Kasich, his single triumph was in Ohio, and his own state was calling for him to drop out before he finally did Wednesday afternoon.
Colbert also poked fun at the bigger loser of the week, Ted Cruz, who he referred to as "Texas senator and half-kissed frog prince, Ted Cruz." Many people have been unsure of Cruz's status as a human, some calling him a lizard or an alien. The uncertainty even prompted the Ted Cruz For Human President website, with testimonials from people like Firstname Lastname who said, "I have seen many people and Ted Cruz is one of them." I am definitely convinced ...
In his segment, Colbert also talked about Cruz "going down swinging" at his poor wife, Heidi, who took not one, but two jabs to the face during Cruz's concession speech. "Apparently he's dropping out of the race to spend more time elbowing his family," the comedian said.
Colbert ended the segment with his cartoon Donald Trump, who has made a few appearances on the show, to pay tribute to all the fallen, with John Kasich from "District Meat," Ted Cruz from "District Human?" and Carly Fiorina from "District Toner." The GOP presidential primaries really have been like an installation of the Hunger Games. The race started with 17 total candidates; sixteen of them have dropped out over time, some before the first primary in Iowa and many others along the way.
So let's take this moment to pay tribute to the fallen: Scott Walker, Rick Santorum, Marco Rubio, Rick Perry, George Pataki, Rand Paul, Bobby Jindal, Mike Huckabee, Lindsey Graham, Jim Gilmore, Carly Fiorina, Ben Carson, Jeb Bush, Ted Cruz, John Kasich, and Chris Christie.
If we're honest, though, with Donald Trump as the presumptive GOP nominee, the Hunger Games haven't even started. So let the odds be ever in our favor moving ahead with this presidential election.
Images: Screenshot from The Late Show (1), Giphy (2)