Wait... What's My Name?

I'm just going to come out and say it: Sean Combs needs to stop changing his damn name. P.Diddy has become Puff Daddy once again and this is really out of control. You get two names, Combs. Your real name and your stage name. Not your real name and, like, three interchangeable stage names. It's been nearly 20 years and he still doesn't get it.

Every time Puffy Diddy Daddy changes his name everyone is like, "Ughhh. Are you serious? Just pick one!" If the names were really cool, that would be one thing, but Puff Daddy, P. Diddy, and Diddy are all completely silly. Everyone grew to accept Puff Daddy as normal-sounding in the 90s because he was putting out really popular music and his name was constantly heard. But then the P. Diddy thing happened in 2001 after he was acquitted on weapon possession charges. He said at the time, "No more Puff Daddy. The first week in June, we're going to have a name-change ceremony. I'm not doing it as serious as Prince. I just want something fresh."

Then in 2005, he announced that he was switching from P. Diddy to just Diddy. Comby Didsy Dasdy said he wanted to "simplify things." "I even started to get confused myself — and when I'd called [sic] someone on the telephone it took me a long time to explain who I was. Too long." You know what's confusing? Changing your name three times.

These name changes are a transparent way of Diddles attempting to maintain his relevancy. It's no surprise that his change back to Puff Daddy was announced in a trailer for his new song, "Big Homie" with Rick Ross and French Montana. He doesn't say anything about the name, he is simply credited as Puff Daddy. Other than the big ass fur coat, nothing about the video is even a throwback to his old Puff Daddy self, so what's the point other than to get people talking? (And really, did he ever stop wearing big ass fur coats?) Plus, he totally sounds like Gucci Mane.

Puffin Daddy is confused by the change himself. In fact, he's claiming that he's been Puff Daddy all along. I mean, I understand if he's been Puff Daddy in spirit, but, dude, you changed your name publicly. Twice.

Not only that, he's trying to make the hashtag #DiddyorDaddy happen. It's not going to happen. The new name might happen, but no matter what, his name will forever be followed by the words, "I think that's what he's calling himself now."