Life

Your Partner Knows When You're Faking It

by Nathalie O'Neill

You might as well give up faking orgasms right away, because your partner can tell whether or not you're sexually satisfied. A study, led by University of Waterloo Psychology PhD candidate Erin Fallis, indicated that sexual communication and ability to recognize emotions were key for both men and women in evaluating their partner's sexual satisfaction.

"We found that, on average, both men and women have fairly accurate and unbiased perceptions of their partners' sexual satisfaction," said Fallis. "We also found that having good communication about sexual issues helped participants to understand their partners' sexual satisfaction. However, even if sexual communication was lacking, a person could still be fairly accurate in gauging his or her partner's sexual satisfaction if he or she was able to read emotions well." So, unless your casual hookup is emotionally stunted, there's no reason he shouldn't be getting you off.

For this study, which was published in the journal Archives of Sexual Behavior this month, Fallis looked at 84 couples. She separated each couple and asked all the participants about their levels of commitment, relationship satisfaction, sexual satisfaction, sexual communication, and measured their emotion recognition abilities.

"Being able to tell if their partners are sexually satisfied will help people decide whether to stick with a current routine or try something new." -Erin Fallis

No research was done by Fallis and her team on why your last casual hookup didn't listen to your bedroom pointers. Instead, it seems like sexual satisfaction is treated as the privilege of long-term lovers who know each others' kinks.

"Over time, a couple will develop sexual routines," said Fallis. "We believe that having the ability to accurately gauge each other's sexual satisfaction will help partners to develop sexual scripts that they both enjoy. Specifically, being able to tell if their partners are sexually satisfied will help people decide whether to stick with a current routine or try something new."

If all else fails, you can always try to fake it till you make it (if you need tips, Vice has got you covered). Research shows that some women are actually faking orgasms to turn themselves on enough in order to actually reach the big O. This might actually be a pretty handy addition to your sexual toolbox, especially if you're one for casual flings — since they don't involve as much commitment, reaching climax is actually harder for women than in long-term relationships. Thanks for breaking it down for us Fallis — now how about some sexual communication every time we get between the sheets?