First things first: Drake University isn't Duke. We know our colors are also blue and white, that our mascots are easy to switch around, and that phonetically speaking — no need to remind us. Calling us the "Ivy of the Midwest" isn't going to help, either. (Although, we'll all proudly drop the phrase when fawning over our small class sizes and professors who actually know our names.)
The rest of the world may know us from our world-famous Drake Relays, but we're more keen to brag about hosting multiple presidential debates and our giant community of absurdly aggressive squirrels. And you may not know, but Des Moines is one of the best places to live in the world (and not only because it's located a mere 155 miles from the World's Largest Truck Stop).
Don't take our word for it, though — just ask one of our esteemed alums about their time in the city: filmmaker John August, PGA champion Zach Johnson, or the late comedian Steve Allen. It doesn't matter if you're a current student, a recent graduate, or longtime alum, you'll be able to look on all of these and crack a smile — because there are some things only we Drake students can truly understand.
Peggy Isn't just the name of A Person
And Neither Is Chad Stephens
(Although he did run for spot on the student senate.)
But Keith Is. And He Rocks.
There's nothing better than getting a big, loud greeting from Keith each time you enter the cafeteria or grab a snack from the C-Store.
You don't think being a D+ Student is a bad thing
you Spend Saturday Nights At The Library
And Then Grab A Ride On The Dub Bus (R.I.P.)
You Wouldn't Be Caught Dead At The Dublin
Because that bar was so freshman year.
you know Drake Relays Aren't really About The Races
Well, for the rest of the world, they are. For Drake students, it's more about the three-day blackout that ends in a university sponsored $1 midnight pancake breakfast.
It's An Excuse For A Massive Paint Fight
And A Beautiful Bulldog Competition
And, Speaking Of, a Porterhouse Is Not a Meal
It's the name of the most famous Beautiful Bulldog. (R.I.P., you handsome devil.)
You've Watched A Pole Vaulting Competition unfold at the local mall
You Know An EGG Party Has Nothing To Do With The Food...
(They're just a house of the greatest guys you'll ever meet.)
...It Just Means You're Probably Not In A Sorority House
you've Stolen A Smooch At Kissing Rock
you think that our President Is Cooler Than most Of yOur Friends
Not only is David Maxwell a rad guitarist, but his dad is jazz icon Jimmy Maxwell.
Especially Considering He Helped The University Break The World Record For "Largest Custard Pie Fight" in 2011
The Isisirettes Have Been The Soundtrack To The Entirety of Your College Life
You've Been A Victim Of "Hubbell Stank"
There's no getting that Hubbell cafeteria smell off of your clothes — just don't make the mistake of going right before class.
And have Walked Through the McDonald's Drive-Through
Which is totally allowed and most definitely expected.
Eventually, You Got used to The Helmick Commons Dragon
And though upon graduation, You May Be Feeling A Little Like This:
Our Drake Memories Are Worth Every Dollar
Because there really is no place like Drake
Gotta love this school.