Maddox Jolie-Pitt Has A Girlfriend (And Other Things That Will Make You Feel Old)
So, Angelina Jolie has revealed that her son, Maddox Jolie-Pitt, has a girlfriend. Not only that, but the Maleficent star totally approves of her, which is more than I can say for how my mother felt about my 12-year-old boyfriend of two days at Jewish sleep-away camp. But Jolie is all for her preteens' foray in the romantic world! Jolie told Entertainment Tonight that Maddox's English girlfriend is "a lovely girl." Aww.
But wait. This means something more than the fact that the Jolie-Pitt clan raises studly gents capable of wooing British tweens. If Maddox has a lady-friend, then... we're old. Like, I'm pretty sure I'm going to walk outside and there will be a subscription for the AARP waiting for me. Maddox was born in 2001, and you remember that year clearly, right? I know that I do! But it was a whopping 13 years ago, when pop music was in its heyday, Britney Spears had never shaved her head, and people quoted Nelly without a trace of irony.
Here are some things that happened in pop culture the year that Maddox was born that might make you feel a little old. Because, let's face it, we're not as chipper as young Maddox is anymore.
Let's talk about music. The Number 1 Song Of 2001 Was "Hanging By A Moment" by Lifehouse.
And the number 100 song was the not-very-appropriately titled "#1," by Nelly.
Remember — this was before JT went off onto his own. You probably had a crush on JC, right? Meanwhile, JT was curling up on the floor breaking hearts with "Gone."
This happened that year:
And you were probably busy watching this show the following day, with some vintage Carson Daly:
And then putting your very deep thoughts in comic sans or some other cool font in an AIM profile.
And what was Angelina Jolie doing at 2001, other than deciding to adopt a child the following year? Oh yeah, this movie:
And then... one year later, she adopted Maddox, who, 13 years later, would have a girlfriend. Of course he has a girlfriend. Look at him in that vest-tie combo!