Ever since I graduated college last year, I feel like I've been in a perpetual funk. It's like I never even left school — I'm constantly overwhelmed by stress that's equivalent to what I felt as a student, but this time around, there aren't any academic papers to show for it. Many of my friends talk about the post grad "struggle," but what do you call a struggle so real and so severe that no amount of alcohol or frozen yogurt or viral cat videos seem to help? This is what I refer to as being on the "struggle bus," which Urban Dictionary defines as "a metaphor for when you repeatedly struggle to do basic tasks," or a phrase "used to metaphorically describe a difficult situation, as in hard schoolwork." Additionally, in my experience, being on the struggle bus extends to experiencing any long-term form of struggling or being in a continual state of uncertainty — a.k.a being a Millennial college graduate.
Now, all aboard the struggle bus... If you realize that more than a handful of the below statements relate to you, GOD SPEED.
1.You feel like a 12-year-old trapped in a supposed “adult” body.
Seriously, HOW DO YOU BREAK FREE?
2. You still buy ramen, Oreos, anything abundantly cheesy, and other stereotypical “college” food.
3. Eating three meals a day at appropriate times is still a huge hurdle you have yet to overcome.
And normal snacking doesn't even exist. Sometimes, you find yourself eating stale potato chips for dinner...at 3 a.m.
4. You drink wine (or some alcoholic beverage) as a morning pick-me-up.
And as your go-to lunch chaser, and your “get me the f*** to sleep” drink. Boozing at inappropriate times has become a common occurrence, and let's all be honest here — this college-learned stress-relieving ritual isn't going anywhere anytime soon.
5. You actually have the worst luck imaginable.
Can you even think of the last time you won something? Unfortunately, freebies and samples at your local grocery store don't count.
6. You don't remember the last time your sleeping schedule was even slightly normal.
What is eight hours anymore?
7. You consume absurd amounts of coffee like it's actually a drug.
And you're afraid to quit because you're scared of your real, caffeine-free self. I'm getting goosebumps just thinking about the thought of giving up caffeine.
8. You're on the struggle bus on such a regular basis that you hashtag #StruggleBusin on your Instagram and Twitter more often than you'd like.
This applies to all my social media-inclined struggle busers.
9. You've referred to "the struggle" on more than one occasion.
Actually, you probably mention it in most conversations.
10. You’re still struggling to find your niche, whether it pertains to your career, your social life, or your romantic relationships.
In the meantime, alcohol helps.
11. Sometimes, upon leaving your house/apartment/box, you realize you never actually looked in the mirror and put on whatever you found first.
12. Dating is a subject you'd rather not talk about right now.
Somehow, finding a suitable mate in a supposed sea of full of single fish is an immense challenge.
13. Because your life sort of sucks at the moment, you find yourself thinking about the future quite a bit.
But then you stop because your future looks even bleaker.
14. You're on a budget that only allots you a few bucks to spend on a meal.
So instead of going out, you decide to mix and match food items from your fridge that are about to expire. Don't deny it — this happens to the best of us.
15. Signing up for a store card or membership of any kind is a big deal.
When you get a regular customer card to a grocery store, you admittedly brag to your friends as if it's a big achievement. It might have been the most exciting thing to happen to you all week.
16. You've been meaning to go to the gym on the regular but are spending too much time working three jobs to make rent.
So now you're tired, broke, and a few pounds heavier than you'd like. Adult life sucks, I know.
17. There's not enough time in the day to do everything you actually want to do.
You even attempt to make checklists, but at the end of the day, you discover you only crossed out a few items, added a few items, or WORSE, you forgot to even look at the list.
18. Prioritizing things in your life, especially how you spend your money, is an exceedingly difficult task.
Should you buy that $10 bottle of vodka or dinner? Decisions, decisions.
19. You're still wrapping your mind around normal adult-type things like taxes.
Like, what exactly are taxes?
20. You actively seek out free activities, especially when your friends ask you "What do you want to do tonight?"
I mean, a FREE walk in the park sounds preferable to an EXPENSIVE movie screening, don't you think?
21. In an effort to procrastinate life, you find yourself taking Internet quizzes to reveal your true calling.
What exactly were you trying to do before reading this? Thought so.
So yeah, things might seem pretty bad right now, but just do you. Know that many post grads are also in your shoes, riding the struggle bus to who knows where. But stay optimistic, and it'll get better down the road!
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