Recap 'Switched At Birth's Midseason Finale So You Can Hit The Ground Running In Season 3.5

Ah, ABC Family teen dramas. Guilty pleasures for some, obsessive pleasures for others (cough, cough, Pretty Little Liars). Fortunately, it's summer, which means Switched at Birth is back, and starting Monday night, we find out what the second half of Season 3 holds. When we last left Bay, Daphne, and their very nontraditional family, the girls were both facing a fair dose of crazy relationship stuff — and not all of it was good. Meanwhile, Regina was dealing with some major drama between her old neighborhood and her workplace, making us feel both terrible and concerned that this woman just cannot seem to hold a job. But if you're a little fuzzy on the details, I totally understand. The last we saw of Switched at Birth was in March, and a lot has happened since then. After all, The Bachelorette is back, and don't pretend you're not watching it.

Don't worry, though — I'm ready to fill you in on everything that happened in the first half of Season 3 so that you're primed for tonight's premiere, and I'm sure it will shock you that the plot is, once again, revolving around Bay and Emmett. (Cue eyeroll.) Here's what you need to know:

Speaking of Bay and Emmett, what's going on?

If you recall, Bay and her current beau Tank, the frat-tastic freshman she met while taking a college art class, are still together, but it doesn't mean she isn't still mooning over Emmett. Nope, she totally is, especially when she thinks he might be getting catfished by Mandy, his new online girlfriend. And Tank, bless his heart, even helps her get to the bottom of it.

So what's actually going on? Emmett finds out when he goes to meet Mandy for the first time and is presented with an actual catfish in a picnic basket. The culprit? Matthew, who used his cousin's photos to create Emmett's dreamgirl. And instead of MTV's Nev and Max jumping out of the bushes to console Emmett and convince Matthew to turn his life around, though, it's Bay who comes to his rescue — with sex. Are we surprised? Not even a little.

And as for Daphne...

She's pretty happy with her new flame, Campbell, who she met doing community service at the clinic. True love. But her time at the clinic isn't all hearts and rainbows. She runs into the douche who robbed her when she was working at the food truck, and Jorge, her boss at the clinic, says they've gotta treat him anyway. And by "they," he means Daphne, because she's the one who ends up helping him when he comes in suffering from some nasty withdrawals. Does she still have it in her to become a doctor, or should she work on her Hell's Kitchen audition tape instead? Jury's still out.

Meanwhile, Toby's marriage has finally imploded.

Not that I didn't call it since, like, three episodes before he and Nikki even tied the knot, but seriously? It's been a sinking ship from the start. Nikki comes back into town after being absent for the majority of their marriage and tells Toby she's headed back to Africa for an indefinite stay, and Toby at first decides to follow her... until some well-placed advice from his mom convinces him to forge his own path. Which apparently means it's time to trade in his ticket to Peru for a one-way ticket to Iceland. Oh, geez.

And the snoozefest parent storylines?

Kathryn's erotic novel (I know, I'm still kinda uncomfortable about it) leaks, and she first blames Lorenzo, her delightful new BFF. Of course, Lorenzo didn't do it — Kathryn's publisher did to drum up interest in the book. And it works.

Meanwhile, Regina's forced to take matters into her own hands when her boss, Wes, starts buying up East Riverside properties at way below market value. Since she's still Reggie From The Block, she drops a few hints that her former neighbors ought to get their real estate appraised before selling it... and upon hearing this, Wes fires her. Oh, and someone throws a brick through her design studio window. Can't this lady catch a break?

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