Hey everyone, it's FINALLY summer. Which is great and everything because hey, who doesn't love the beach, longer days, and a fruity cocktail poolside? But the one thing that sweet summer isn't so great for is good hair days. That is, unless you're a "chosen one" and have beautifully long, thick, and glimmering locks that are defined by Darwinian genes, sheer perfection, and angel kisses. But, not all of us mere mortals are as lucky as you perfectly coiffed superstars.
Some of us peasants are subjected to the elements no matter how much time we spend beating our curls down with multiple brushes, hairspray, and a blow torch. We curly-haired mortals answer to a higher god, and his hallowed name is Humidity. And we bow at his feet.
Now, not every frizzy hair day is the same. As you know, there are multiple factors that go into a degree of frizziness — newly washed hair is the easiest to destroy, if it's drizzling just slightly you're inevitably screwed. And oh yeah, if it's hot and you're sweating, the 45 minutes you spent straightening your hair is all for naught.
But rest your weary souls because you aren't alone.
There are others who face this same fate and some have even made it onto our coveted small screens, big screens, and even some silver screens, too. That's right, there TV and movie characters who face this plight, too, and they can guide us through this hardship.
Below is your various degrees of frizziness, as told by fictional characters with really bad hair:
THE VACATION FRIZZ
Level: Monica in Barbados.
A special kind of frizz that only tropical islands you spend thousands of dollars on to visit can produce. You know, so you look extra horrific on your romantic vacay.
THE NATURAL FRIZZ
Level: Year 1 Hermione Granger
Think you can leave the house without applying 400+ degrees of heat to that mane? THINK AGAIN.
THE FRIZZ THAT SNEAKS UP ON YOU
Level: Jessie Spano
After hours of primping and spraying and taming, you look all sorts of GOOD. You think, "I'm really gonna beat it this time." Confidently, you step outside for one solitary moment to admire the day before it passes and as you walk back in, you catch your reflection and you realize that your hair has other plans for you. Solitude.
THE FRIZZ THAT MOCKS YOU
Level: Mia Thermopolis
You decide not to fight nature this day. Curse what's fashionable, you have curly hair and you're proud! You throw some gel in there, some mousse for good measure. You think, why don't I just leave it natural more often? This is the way it's meant to be! You're happy with your decision — that is, until you get the horrified looks from your co-workers because your hair is now the size of a small planet after being outside for a mere two minute walk.
THE MIDSUMMER FRIZZ
Level: Isabella Garcia-Shapiro
It's July something or other, and you've just about had it with mirrors. And life. You've burnt out your straightner, CVS has roped off the hair care aisle, and your support group changed it's meeting spot without telling you. And then you realize something: You can't fight nature. This is your lot in life. The only thing to do now is own it.
Work that frizz, girl. Work it.