How to Get Out of Work for the U.S.-Germany Game

America's favorite head coach, U.S. Soccer Coach Jurgen Klinsmann, wrote you an excuse to get out of work for the U.S.-Germany game tomorrow, so now you don't have to worry about missing it! The game starts at 12 pm EST, and yes, you need to watch it. If the U.S. wins or ties Germany tomorrow, that means we'll advance to the round of 16 at the World Cup — an exciting feat made even better by the fact that we entered the tournament in the "Group of Death," so-called because of how challenging it would be to get out of the first round.

The U.S. was never expected to be a threat, but in beating Ghana in its first game and just almost totally nearly getting it in a 2-2 tie with Portugal on Sunday, the team's proven itself to be a real contender in the cup. #Boom. May as well title this World Cup "How the U.S. Got Its Groove Back" — unless you wanted to consider the equally stunning wins and losses from teams all over the world, from Costa Rica's unbelievable advancement to the round of 16 to Italy's stunning ouster. (They went out, memorably, with a bite.)

If all that excitement isn't enough to get you to tune in on Thursday, though, there's always Klinsmann's get-out-of-work free card, below.

Skipping work to day-drink and yell with abandon like you're from a real country that appreciates the heartbreaking yet heart-leaping wonder of soccer? Why not? Seriously, when Costa Rica advanced to the round of 16, its president ran around a fountain in jubilation with hundreds of fans while wearing a team jersey. That could be us.

Wait, that is us.

Klinsmann's note gives these instructions to your boring old employer who thinks Thursday, June 26 is just another day (it most certainly is not):

I understand that this absence may reduce the productivity of your workplace, but I can assure you that it is for an important cause. The #USMNT has a critical World Cup game vs. Germany and we will need the full support of the nation if we are to advance to the next round.

Hear that, Internet? We don't need your number-crunching odds and spreadsheets that determine what needs to happen in the concurrent Ghana-Portugal game if we lose to Germany. Tomorrow, everyone needs to take one for the team, blow off work, and party, because #IBelieveThatWeWillWin.

And I'm not just saying that because it's my birthday. It's for the country, OK?