In Other News: August 5, 2013

'In Other News' is Bustle's daily roundup of the stories, videos, and more media you might have missed.

New York mayoral candidate Christine Quinn — who wasn't a frontrunner before Weinergate but now stands an excellent shot at the job — has come out with a proposal for a toddler's version of student loans. Yes, really. Worried about paying off college loans? Well, now you can worry about paying off your kindergarten loans, too!

Can nuclear power help rescue us all from global warming? Sure it can, says science — if we can afford it.

This guy has spent tens of thousands of dollars on a roller-coaster tour of the country. That wasn't an adjective — he's literally doing a tour of roller-coasters across America, and has no plans to stop.

This blind couple fell in love when their guide dogs became infatuated with each other. WE CAN'T EVEN.

Remember Clint Eastwood and the chair in the run-up to Obama's re-election? Well, apparently when Mitt Romney's strategist saw it, he immediately threw up. #SorryWe'reNotSorry.

Speaking of, does the undercurrent of trauma, or the expectation of it, run through everyday life? This editorial argues that it does.

There's a new eggplant in town, and it's sort of small and scrawny, but tasty.

Ever wondered how exactly to go about keeping your man happy? In the 1950s, they had manuals. Here's one!

Remember Sarah Haskins from Target: Woman? If you don't, get informed (and very amused) with this:

She's now heading up a new TV show called Trophy Wife that's already being hailed as a must-watch. Trailer here:

In a few weeks, you'll be able to get SimCity on your Mac!

Also: someone put a cock in space.

Well, of course it's a bloody rooster. What else did you think we meant?

While you're mind's in the gutter, we hear that orgasms are better for your brain than crosswords. No, really! Also, the scientist that figured this out has been boasting about his sexual techniques with rats, which is weird.

Sesame Street's Cookie Monster has done an unmissable cover of Icona Pop's "I Love It."

Also, it's Monday, so here's a bunch of GIFs that express all of our emotions about that.