I scream, you scream, every single one of us is simultaneously shrieking for ice cream. Why? Pfft… is that even a question? July is National Ice Cream Month, so as an American citizen, you’re obliged to eat ice cream for 31 days. We're kidding, but not entirely. We just think this is the way you should be celebrating. One Baskin Robins flavor for each day, of the month is entirely doable. Beyond consuming as many frozen treats as your belly can handle, you’ve got to dress the part of an ice cream lover.If you’re in the game for real, it’s necessary.
After all, you don’t want to show up at the parlor looking like some ice cream charlatan. You’re devoted to custard, Italian ice, gelato, soft serve, hard ice cream, and all of the permutations thereof. As a true fan, it’s up to you to assemble an ensemble that communicates this. That and, well, maybe you don't want to wear all white if you're planning to get chocolate.
Luckily, ice cream is a unilaterally happy thing. It’s great in a cone, a cup, or printed on your shirt. The one unfortunate place it can end up is on the ground or running down your dress, and there are ways to prevent that. For those of you who keep ice cream month orthodox, we’ve assembled a guide that breaks down exactly how to dress for the ongoing holiday.
Use clothing as creative visualization...
Now's the time to break that King Cone screen-print tee out of your closet. Truly, there's nothing more perfect to wear to get ice cream than ice cream-printed clothing: it's festive, it makes everyone around you smile, and it reveals your die-hard fan status. If you get lucky enough, dressing to theme may even get you a free cone!
Ice Cream Pattern Sleeveless Chiffon Blouse, $22 at Chicnova
Everyone will be so happy to look at you all day!
Mr. Gugu & Miss Go Ice Cream Shirt, $47.64 at Asos
When pop culture meets ice cream, the angels cry tears of joy!
Miley Cyrus Ice Cream Shirt, $14.99 at Etsy
Sound your battle cry... You're here for cream.
Slogans, slogans and more slogans. There are thousands of tees out there that will proclaim your love for ice cream. Everyone in the immediate vicinity will know precisely how you do, and that you're always DTEIC (Down To Eat Ice Cream). Beyond that, wearing one of these shirts will just put a smile on your face. Long after you've satiated the little ice cream troll in your belly, people will talk to you all day about ice cream, allowing you to re-live the experience over and over again.
Tank Top $29 at Look Human
Your clothing don't front... You're here for all the ice cream.
Tee, $28 at Look Human
Account for the possibility of things getting messy...
Stains are an occupational hazard for receiving the holy sacrament of frozen dairy treats. Ice cream melts, dribbles down your chin, and tumbles down your front when least expected, leaving you looking like a colicky baby. Try to dress for your favorite flavor: brown if it's chocolate, pink for strawberry, or black, which will absorb everything. You'll be happy you wore a stain-friendly color when you're biting the bottom of the cone to reach the dregs...
When all else fails, there are always bibs!
It wouldn't hurt to stuff a napkin into your shirt. Enjoying your treats with abandon is more important than dignity.