Let this be a lesson, folks: if you write something steamy, there's a very good chance that it will get leaked, and then an even better chance that it will get turned into comedy gold. Look no further than what you'll see in the video below, in which John Oliver reads President Warren G. Harding's love letters on Last Week Tonight. But before you regale these letters as sweet, loving artifacts of an affair, think again. We're gettin' tawdry here. The 29th President of the United States of America was actually a smutmaster.
In case you need to get up to speed on the matter, Hardings' love letters to his mistress were released this past week, which, of course, changed the way high school American history classes would be run forever. Oliver, however, points out these letters could make you blush, as they're the sort of erotica that "a 40-year-old mother of two would read on her Kindle," as he puts it. ("Pillowing breasts" is totally a literary trope from the "Mom Beach Reads" section.) Further, it's even funnier to watch Oliver read Harding's letter's aloud.
And ya gotta admit: Warren G. Harding, for all that he didn't do as President, was kind of a pimp with words. This president had panties droppin' with the quill of his actual pen. (Ugh, you guys. Not everything is a dick joke.)
You can watch Oliver read Harding's letters below: