Wiseau Really Wants To Make His Sitcom Happen

by Casey Rackham

Everyone, Tommy Wiseau has an important message for us: "Oh, hi America!" In case you're wondering, that's The Room -inspired tagline for the director/producer/actor/enigma's much anticipated sitcom The Neighbors. Thanks to the The A.V. Club's eagle-eyed sighting of Wiseau's brand-spankin' new website, we now know that the creator of possibly the worst-best dark comedy in history is officially planning to release his rumored show this fall.

According to the website, the sitcom, which has reportedly been in the works since 2004, will follow a group of neighbors who all live in the same apartment complex, and who are a "cocktail of characters [who] always guarantee plenty of surprises." If that's not enough to entice you, then maybe the fact that there is character called Princess Penelope who "witnesses the ghost of her Uncle Prince Charles" will make you want to watch it. (We couldn't make this stuff if we tried.)

Back in 2011, Wiseau told IndieWire that he was still working on the sitcom, but besides a short trailer that's been floating around the Internet, there's been limited information about the actuality of the show coming to fruition. But thanks to Wiseau, we now have a gloriously neon website and a super creepy sneak-peak to look at (underwear advertisements are involved) in addition to the original trailer.

Based on the exact words from the synopsis of the pilot, here's what we can expect to see:

  • Mariana is obsessed about bugs in her apartment.
  • Monica catches her boyfriend Den in Bed with Patrick.
  • Princess Penelope arrives and Darren serenades her with accompaniment from the other tenants.
  • Richard becomes Princess Penelope's butler and handyman.
  • Ed prepares a birthday party for Bebe.

But here's what we really want to know: Will elements of The Room be mixed into the show? Because we have some serious questions about this sitcom that need to be answered:

  • Will Mark be present?
  • What will the framed-photo situation be like?
  • Who will be wearing the sexy red dress?
  • Will the show be set in San Francisco?
  • Who's going to be torn apart?
  • Will Lisa's mom still have cancer?
  • Will Lisa even be on the show?
  • Is Denny all grown up now? Is Denny the "Den" that's referred to in the synopsis? IS HE?
  • Who will be Tommy's best friend?
  • Will he tell him or her that they're his best friend in every scene?
  • How big of a part will The Bridge have in this show?
  • How many apples will be eaten?
  • Will they drink shitty or fancy alcohol?
  • Who is going to be the "drug addict"?
  • Will he or she get in trouble for liking drugs?
  • And finally, how many times will Wiseau take off his shirt?

Until the supposed release of The Neighbors, I'll be patiently waiting for his promised vampire movie, because of course that's a thing.

Images: giphy.com