Gummy Bear Bratwurst?! It's Sweeping The Nation (Sorta) And It's Gross (Definitely)
In a country where people dip their fries into chocolate milkshakes, and rotten egg, vomit, and booger are all official jellybean flavors, it's not all that surprising that gummy bear bratwurst is now a thing. And yes, it's exactly what it sounds like: gummy bears ground up with meat and stuffed into a sausage casing. Yes, literally. No, it's not code for something else. What started as a dare-like challenge in Hugo, Minn. is now sweeping the nation, unfortunately.
Grundhofer's Old-Fashion Meats in Hugo is known for its bratwursts — its normal bratwursts of the pork, beef, or other normal meat variety. But one day, when owner Spencer Grundhofer asked for new flavor suggestions to add to their 40 existent bratwurst varieties, his troublemaking friend and neighbor Joe Berglund suggested gummy bears. Berglund started sending his own customers over to the meat shop to request for gummy bear bratwursts. After resisting for a few months, Grundhofer finally gave in.
"Finally after six months, I called his bluff," Grundhofer told KARE 11. "I went and got some gummy bears. I said, 'You know what? I made them, you eat them.'"
Not only did Berglund eat them, but customers did too. Grundhofer says he makes between 50 and 75 pounds of gummy bear brats per week. What seems like a simple case of an entire town going insane becomes a lot more complicated when you consider other cities are partaking in this new foodie trend, which sounds like two stoners getting experimental with whatever's laying around in the fridge.
Kramarczuk's sausage shop in Minneapolis borrowed Grundhofer's recipe and made their own gummy bear sausage, but they were less successful because the sugar leaked onto the pan and burned the brats. And then the trend traveled south to Austin, a city renowned for its barbecue. Why, Austin, why?
Even Zagat reviewed the gummy bear bratwurst when it visited Austin's Banger's Sausage House and Beer Garden. The gummy bear option at Banger's is served with caramelized onions and spicy mustard on a kolache bun. Sounds like a serious dish, right? But how can you keep a straight face when describing it to your customers knowing that there are cooked bits of bright green and orange gummy bears stuffed into the meat?
"It'd be nice to be known for the original gummy bear brat, which I think we are," Grundhofer said. "I don't know anybody else that's done it."
Nope, incorrect. It looks like you've started something here. So thanks a lot, Grundhofer. But not only are you not remorseful, but you seem proud of your little invention, even though it pretty much signals the downfall of humanity.
In light of this new gummy bear bratwurst phenomenon, here's a list of ingredients we'd rather see stuffed into a sausage than gummy bears.
- Turkey stuffing
- Mac 'n cheese
- Crust, cheese, and tomato sauce (so it's an inverted pizza — get it?!)
- Taco Bell
- Pierogies, sauerkraut, and onions (an entire entree in one sausage)
- Banh mi
- Baby back ribs
- An entire spring roll (cooked to crisp perfection inside the sausage, somehow)
- More sausage
Images: allison.hare/Flickr; YouTube