Finally, someone has answered the question we never knew we needed asked: What if lead guitarists looked down mid-shred to find that their Fender has been replaced with a shell-less gastropod mollusk? Enter Slug Solos, the Tumblr that uses a basic knowledge of Photoshop to replace photos of musicians soloing on guitars with photos of slugs.
And Slug Solos is not the first of its kind. No, the Tumblr is but a sequel to Bass Dogs, the Tumblr that — you guessed it — Photoshops out musicians' bass guitars and replaces them with dogs. Both concepts are simple, utterly ridiculous, and emerged from the mind of a Glasgow native who goes by the name of Michael M.
Is it absurd? Yes. Is it a silly waste of time? Yes, but so are lots of things, welcome to the Internet. And don't tell me you can't look at that picture of Este Haim cradling a slug, looking like she is crying out in utter disgust and not laugh. After all, they're still living things, these slugs. If you tickle them with guitar-playing fingers, do they not laugh? Actually, probably not, I don't think slugs have mouths. If you accidentally scratch them with your guitar pick, do they not bleed? Well... do slugs even have blood? I don't think so, but they have mucus, right? What was I talking about? Anyway, here's some pictures of famous guitarists holding slugs.
Angus Young Holding a Slug
More like "If You Want Slug," am I right? Because it's an AC/DC song? Get it? I'm sorry, everyone.
James Hetfield Cradling a Slug
Whoa, Metallica guitarist James Hetfield looks pissed. I do not want to be that slug. Or James Hetfield. Or anyone holding a giant slug, actually.
Eddie Van Halen Surprising a Slug
Bet he did a "Jump" after he saw that slug, huh? Oh god, someone please stop me.
Bruce Springsteen Touching a Slug
The best part about this picture is that you can see Springsteen's inner monologue if he were holding a slug: "Aw man, this slug is pretty gross... but I'm just gonna roll with it."
B.B. King Grabbing a Slug
Best one by far. I...I simply have no words.
Santana Caressing a Slug
Don't be so disgusted by that slug, Carlos Santana. Sure, you might think it's slimy, but I bet Rob Thomas would think it's pretty "Smooth." (I'm sorry. The puns are controlling me now.)
Prince Hugging a Slug
Prince actually isn't disgusted by the fact that he's holding a slug, he's just mad that the slug dared to make eye contact with him.