Peaches Look Like Butts, So of Course Someone Went and Put Tiny Underwear on Them
You know, I can’t say that I’ve ever stopped while eating a peach to think, “Gosh, this thing that I am eating looks an awful lot like a butt”; apparently, though, it happens, so it was really only a matter of time before someone went and made tiny little pairs of underwear and stuck them on a whole bunch of peaches. And not only that, but these panty-clad peach butts can be yours for the low, low price of 498 yuan (or $80) a box — plus a trip to China.
According to Kotaku, these fleshy little bottoms are being sold in honor of the Chinese Qixi Festival, which begins this year on Aug. 2. First developed by a fruit vendor in Nanjing, they come in decorative boxes of nine, with each peach resting on a luxurious bed of satin. The vendor calls them “Ripe Fruit” (we see what you did there!).
I do have to admit that the undies are kind of cute; I’d probably wear them myself if they came in actual human sizes. Alas, like most grown women, my behind is significantly larger than a peach, so I will have to do without. I did, however, manage to come up with a list of other fruit and clothing combinations that could be the next big hit (maybe that tree that grows 40 different kinds of fruit might make use of them?). Just remember: You saw them here first.
1. Pineapples in Skirts
Because Spongebob's house just looks so naked.
2. Clementines in Bras
One clementine per cup.
3. Strawberries in Sandals
I’ll admit that I dreamed up this one purely because I like the alliteration.
4. Tomatoes in Sun Hats
Who says the sweet fruits get to have all the fun?
5. Bananas in Pajamas
Oh, wait. Those already exist. My bad.