Spencer Pratt & Heidi Montag Are Still Together But These 7 Things Seemed More Likely

First things first, Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag are, in fact, alive. No worries there. But, not only are they still breathing the same oxygen you are on the very same planet that you inhabit, there's one more shocking and utterly perturbing fact: Spencer and Heidi are still together . As a couple. For real. Well, as real as Spencer and Heidi can get. Which is, as you know, a negligible amount. But as far as we know, they're still canoodling. After all this damn time, after every Hills couple that graced our screens ended, AFTER THE LOVE OF JUSTIN BOBBY AND AUDRINA WAS NO MORE, Speidi was the pair to make it. If that doesn't want to make you settle down in a far away cottage with a few cats and bottle of pinot, I don't really know what else will.

Have no fear, friends, for I was just as shocked to hear this as you. In order to truly settle our feelings on the issue, why don't we hash out the things we thought were more likely to happen by now than Speidi still being in a lasting relationship.

Contacting Intelligent Life in the Ether

Still. Waiting.

Image: Giphy

The Resurgence of Visors In Un-Sportlike Activities

Like, for fashion.

Image: Giphy

Zooey Deschanel Growing Out Her Bangs

Okay, I guess that was never going to happen.

Image: Giphy

Jennifer Lawrence's Fall From Grace

Ha, okay. The chances of that were slim, but this is Speidi we’re talking about!

Image: Giphy

George Clooney Getting Married

The Discovery of Jimmy Hoffa

Worth a shot.

Image: Giphy

Ryan Gosling's Hand In Marriage


Image: Giphy