Did you hear that Beyoncé has her own island in the Caribbean called Beyoncéland where you get executed if you mention Jay Z? Did you hear that Jay Z wrote a version of "Crazy in Love" called "Beyoncé's Crazy in Love and I Want a Separation"? If either of those sound insane to you, then you're getting the general idea of the exact level of ridiculousness present in the rumors flying about Beyoncé and Jay Z's marriage. Of course, we probably figured the rumors had hit an all new low when that woman submitted a maternity lawsuit against Beyoncé for custody of Blue Ivy, but Funny or Die has taken the ridiculousness to a whole new level in their parody video. In fact, Funny or Die's parody of the Beyonce and Jay Z divorce rumors is hilarious for the sheer fact that if you ignore what they're actually saying, everyone in this video is basically just all of us right now.
It opens with two girls sitting in public, one of whom is gushing about an On the Run Tour concert she just saw. Suddenly, someone says, "Are you talking about Beyoncé and Jay Z?" and then launches into the latest divorce rumor that they've heard. It starts off normally, with a reference to the rumor that Jay Z and Beyoncé's on stage chemistry was lacking, and then gets progressively ridiculous. Like, for example, claiming that Beyoncé doesn't wake up like this? Don't be ridiculous! Beyoncé is the queen of waking up like this.
Ultimately, the Beyoncé fan tells everyone to shut up because she hates when people spread rumors about Bey and Jay... only to immediately begin spreading another rumor. The Funny or Die video is hilarious because it's so incredibly true to life. Whether you're a Beyoncé and Jay Z fan or not, whether you believe the rumors or think they're getting stupider, the fact of the matter is that Beyoncé and Jay Z are all that anyone is talking about right now. And that when we do talk about them, we sound exactly like this.
Check out the video below.