Which of These Nonsensical Hypothetical Situations Do You Think Brought Landry to 'Breaking Bad'?

You guys, Landry Clarke is not the boy we once knew. Under the fine tutelage of Coach Taylor down in Dillon, Texas, Landry was a strapping young lad who wanted nothing more than to belong and love a crazy gal named Tyra. But this is not that boy. No, that boy is long gone. Todd (if that is his real name...) is not that pimple-faced, awkward but strong young nerd who followed his buddy Saracen around like an overeager puppy. Indeed, it seems as though the bumbling boy we once knew and loved has broken bad in a big way.

When it comes to crazy Internet Breaking Bad theories, throwing an additional looney tune onto the pile is an exercise in futility. So no such thing will be done here, but riddle me this: pretend Breaking Bad was not at all about Walter White, but rather just the story of what happened to Landry Clarke after he graduated East Dillon High School with a little bit of extra background — absurd, no? Of course, which is why we must entertain it — because what is television if not entertaining above all else? Besides, Landry certainly had outside driving forces that could cause him to run away. Growing up the nerdy outsider, the awkward weirdo, the creative musician in a rural town that just didn't understand him? Pent up frustration is real.

But is it possible? No! Of course not. (Also, I have a life I like to live from time to time between researching crazy TV theories k-holes.) That would be dumber than if Jesse turned around and decided that Walt was really just a nice, misunderstood meth kingpin with a heart of gold. But that doesn't mean we can't have a little bit of hypothetical fun at Vince Gilligan and Peter Berg's expenses, right? So what, pray tell, could take the boy who scored the game-winning, season-ending field goal against the Panthers and turn him into a meth kingpin? Let's speculate!

  • Rice University. College isn't for everyone you guys. Sure, maybe Landry excelled at school (he was always such a good student), but perhaps the thrill of the high life caused him to use his science skills for evil.
  • Tyra. How could Tyra do this to Landry? Well she couldn't, but by ending up with Tim Riggins (Tim Riggins 4eva), she probably broke poor lil Landry's heart all over again. And as we all saw with Jesse, love lost can be a real killer.
  • I mean, he did murder the rape guy. But let's just pretend season two of FNL never happened, mmkay?
  • Uncle Nazi. THIS GUY. This guy is bad news bears. And, just like the Walt/Jesse relationship, a terrible father figure can do ugly things to a weak and vulnerable person. And Uncle Nazi probably knows a guy who could help Landry change his name to Todd.
  • Ego. It's the most addictive drug of all!
  • Little Man Syndrome. Always playing second fiddle to Saracen was probably just one example of a pattern of behavior for Landry. (Humans are creatures of habit!) Maybe all that built up anger and resentment finally reared its ugly head and Landry decided he wanted to be the one who knocks.
  • Or maybe it's just because he killed that kid. Spoiler alert: once you murder a child for pretty much no reason, you're as bad as bad can get. Also, getting away with literal murder probably makes you feel pretty invincible.