This Election Night Name Is Gold

Election Night fast approacheth, and with it comes America's own unique way of dealing with itself. Thankfully that will include, as always, Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert's hosting of a night of election coverage through The Daily Show and The Colbert Report. And since it's the latter's last year covering election night (nooooooo!!!), The Colbert Report 's going out with a bang: Their election night coverage title is rather outrageous.

Commentating on the fate of the nation from a comical standpoint is probably one of the harder broadcast jobs out there, but perhaps easier than it is to try to keep a straight face. And oh, they are readying us to laugh through our pain. The Daily Show's election special title is relatively straightforward: "Democalypse 2014: America Remembers It Forgot to Vote."

The Colbert Report's, though? That one's such a doozy it's getting its own block quote:

Midterms ‘014: Detour to Gridlock: An Exciting Thing That I Am Totally Interested In—Wait! Don’t Change the Channel. Look at this Video of a Duckling Following a Cat Dressed Like a Shark Riding a Roomba! ‘014!

I used to be scared for election night. Now I'm both scared and pretty psyched.