This Woman's Glorious Mustache Transformations Are What Social Media Was Made To Be Used For—PHOTOS

Break out the 'stache wax, y'all, it's about to get mustache-stastic up in this joint. S. Van Lokey is a Dallas woman who also happens to own more than one fake mustache. Last year, for her own amusement, she began taking photos of herself as different mustachioed characters of her own creation. This year, she's doing it again with the aim (in addition to amusing herself and others) of raising a little bit of moolah for the annual Movember campaign. Humor and dollars for cancer? It's not quite Patch Adams, but it's just heartwarming and absurd, which I support without question. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some Amazon Prime moustache shopping to do #feelinginspired #blessed #burtreynolds. 

Since I work from home, I haven't had much of an opportunity to scope out dude co-workers rocking their glorious Movember chin-pube growth. I technically work with three dudes, but they are a dog and two cats and as such, technically always have facial hair and also relish crop dusting me while I am hard at work. You know, typical boy stuff. 

When I did work in an office (*pauses, shudders, goes to corner to sit on the floor and rock in a fetal position for a time*), the guy were all about Movember, which irked me. This is not because I am an evil super-villain who thinks cancer should be allowed to run rampant, nor is it because I am a kill-joy. My perma-scowl for the month was due to two reasons: First, I like facial hair and think it's a damn tease to check see all these dudes working what their dads gave them for the month and then ditching their swag looks. Also, I hate shaving any and all parts of my body and feel as though women should be encouraged to join Movember by offering to not shave their legs, pits, Ladytown, or face. I also feel we should be encouraged to burn our bras for charity but that is because the bra I am wearing today is unfitting. Not because, you know, feminism. 

Still, if I am not allowed to chalk up my poor grooming habits to a sense of humorous altruism, I am glad Van Lokey (also the best name of all time) found a way to make Movember accessible for broads. It also helps that the photos she takes are beyond captivating. She says none of the photos are based on actual people, but I swear to god I did a double take at one I was 75% sure was Ernest Hemingway. 

Image: Facebook (10) 

An Idea is Born

This was only the beginning for Van Lokey…

The Eyes Have It

This one reminds me vaguely of a man whose life long dream was to start a produce store of his own. A man with a mustache can dream, my friends. 

His Name In Lights!

This is the kind of guy who in old movies is always asking girls if they want to be on Broadway. 

All About That Pipe

This isn’t Sigmund Freud, but it could be some dude he used to box with from time to time. 

The Surly Fishman

His boat stinks to high heaven. 

Gino?

Am 90% sure this guy lives on my block. 

Look Out, Most Interesting Man In The World

I want to go to there. 

Biopic Please?

Paging Clark Cable, we’ve found your successor. 

All The Eggs You Have

This guy is clearly related to Ron Swanson. 

Noir, Much?

This guy might not be able to figure out if your husband’s cheating, but he’ll look damn good doing it.